How We Came To Be
by tuesday's child
Summary: Final Chapter Now Added....Please Read and Review. Author's note will be posted soon.
1. Arrival

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing. The characters of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel: The Series belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, blah, blah. Just don't sue me, k?

**Author's Notes: **This story is a little odd, but I think you may actually like it. It starts out in 2003, but backtracks to 2002, right after Older and Far Away.

**~*~**

**Chapter 1**

**2003**

****

Buffy closed her eyes and leaned back against the kitchen counter, gently shifting the soft weight in her arms. She maneuvered with one arm to hit the buttons on the microwave, then hit START. She looked down at the baby in her arms.

"Where's your daddy, huh?" She asked the one-year-old softly, "Can we say, apocalypse? Hm?" Buffy placed a gentle kiss on her daughter's soft blond curls, "You're first word will come soon, I promise."

As the microwave beeped, she could hear the front door open and close, and a muffled 'Bloody Hell!!' as a small crash came from the living room.

"Let's just hope you don't take after your father in the speaking department." Buffy murmured, coaxing the bottle into the baby's mouth. A moment later, a bleached blond head poked around the doorway.

"Did I wake you two up?"

"Nope, Cassie beat you to the waking up."

Spike smiled and dropped a kiss on Buffy's forehead, "How about this. Next time, you can go save the world from the baddies, and I'll go on baby patrol."

"Sounds fun to me." Buffy chirped, then handed Cassandra to her father, "Take her a sec, I'll be back."

Spike made faces at the baby until the Slayer returned, a small package in her hand.

"What's that, luv?"

"I don't know. It came to the shop today addressed to William Broadstreet. That's you I'm guessing."

"Yeah, I've used that name before. But not since the early eighties, at least."

They switched, and Spike took the package, giving Cassandra over to Buffy. He opened it quickly, finding the box velvet-covered and jade-green. He knew immediately what it was and looked up to meet Buffy's questioning eyes.

"Take Cassandra, get some things and go." He said, his voice trembling slightly.

"Spike, what is it?"

"Please. Just leave now before it...Go. Buffy, please."

She regarded him carefully and saw fear in his icy blue eyes. "OK...but I want you to come with us. If something's in that box that could harm you, just leave it here. We'll go somewhere together."

He shook his head and kissed her forehead, "It won't hurt me. Just go, and I'll call you as soon as I can. OK?"

Buffy was silent for several moments, "OK. OK, I'll go. But promise me this won't hurt you."

"I promise."

Buffy smiled shakily then leaned up to kiss him gently, "I'll go get some things together."

Spike leaned against the counter and looked down at the box, "So, you've decided to teach me my lesson, Dru?" He set the box down, "Bring it on."

****

****

**2002**

****

"How the bloody Hell did it get into my crypt?!" Spike yelled as the demon charged at him. He ducked and rolled into its legs, sending it sprawling.

"I don't KNOW! I'm suffering from half-nudity here, Spike." Buffy retorted, snapping the other one's neck, then joined Spike in fighting the third demon. The first lay dead on the floor next to its counterpart. Spike took a moment to glance at her. She wore only a pair of hip-hugging jeans and her bra. They had been slightly busy when the demons had shown up. She tossed the demon off her and Spike grabbed it by the ears, snapping its neck easily.

Buffy fell backwards onto the bed, panting slightly, "That was fun."

"Yeah..." Spike muttered, examining a small cut in the palm of his hand, "The first one got me with his dagger."

"You're hand ok?" Buffy asked sitting up and taking his wrist in her hand. He pulled away gently.

"I'm fine. I'm gonna drag these guys out and...dispose of them. Don't want demon blood in the carpet."

Buffy rolled her eyes, "I'll get dressed and help..."

An hour later, they were back at the crypt. Buffy picked up her bag. 

"I should go." She said, "It's almost daylight."

Spike nodded, crossing the room as he finished wrapping his hand in a bandage. He stopped just in front of her and quirked a small smile, "Going back to the real world, pet?"

"Yeah. The one I actually live in?" She shouldered the bag and turned to leave, but Spike grabbed her shoulder, turning her to him. Buffy looked up at him, her eyes questioning and slightly annoyed. Spike dipped his head and pressed his lips to hers, gently moving them against her, kissing her softly. Buffy lifted her arms around his neck, her fingers carding through his hair. Spike parted her lips and their tongues began a slow dance, fighting gently for dominance. The bag slipped off Buffy's shoulder and fell to the floor with a thud. Spike's hands wandered down her body, resting at her waist under her shirt.

"Screw the real world." Buffy murmured into the kiss, then hopped up, her legs encircling his waist. She tore at his shirt, the kiss becoming more and more feverish as their passion built. Buffy tore her mouth away from his, her lips descending on his neck. Spike carried her to the bed and she slid off of him. She lay back, pulling him with her. He rested his weight on his elbows, his body over hers. Buffy continued her journey down his neck, kissing and nipping down to his pale chest. They turned so that she was on top of him, her mouth hot against his skin. Muscles contracted under her kiss and she tasted the coolness of his skin, stopping at the waistband of his jeans.

Spike watched as she unbuttoned and unzipped the jeans. Buffy smiled wickedly up at him as she pulled them down over his hips, then pulled off his boots so she could pull the jeans down all the way. She discarded his boxers, her eyes falling on his already hard member. She leaned back up and kissed him hotly on the lips, her hand grabbing onto his hard cock.

  
"Slayer..." He moaned, as her hand began to move up and down his length."Oh, fuck. Slayer." Spike's hands ripped her shirt away from her body, and his fingers expertly undid her bra. His mouth took a similar path as Buffy had on him. Down her neck, he kissed, biting gently at her pulse point, his desire heightened as he heard the blood pumping away under her smooth skin. He moved down to her chest and caught one perky breast in his mouth, laving the nipple into hardness, then paid the same attention to the other. Buffy moaned at his ministrations and her hand squeezed his erection.

Spike flipped them over. He kissed the underside of her breasts, then licked down her abdomen, flicking her belly button with his tongue. Buffy threaded her fingers through his hair, looking down at him with a smile on her face. He took off her jeans and practically tore off her panties, then spread her legs. Spike looked up at her with a cheshire grin, then dipped his head between her legs, tasting her intimately. His tongue flicked over her swollen clit, and she gasped.

"Spike...Spike I want you." She murmured, her fingers pulling almost painfully at his hair. Spike looked up at her, then crawled up the length of her body. He then claimed her lips in a passionate kiss. Buffy could taste herself on his tongue and the sensation drove her to the brink of insanity. She arched her back, bringing her hips against Spike's. He took the hint and rubbed the tip of his cock against her slickened entrance. Just when she thought she would have to force him into her before she died of anticipation, Spike entered her in one thrust, filling her and sending jolts of pleasure up her spine.

Buffy moaned into his neck, her tongue darting out to lick his earlobe. He shuddered and began to move slowly in and out of her tight core. Her hips moved with his in an ancient rhythm, their pace picking up into a frenzy of moving bodies as pleasure built in their bodies.

"Buffy...Oh, God...Slayer." Spike mumbled incoherently, his face morphing into its vampyric visage as his orgasm overtook him, his seed releasing deep inside her. Buffy's muscles clenched around him as her own climax came upon her. Spike collapsed on top of her, their bodies pressed together as he fought to catch unnecessary breath.

"That...was...we made it to the bed." Buffy panted in his ear. Spike laughed, the vibrations in his chest thrumming against hers.

"Yes, we did. Finally." He lifted himself up on his elbow and pulled out of her. He rolled away, so he lay on his side. Buffy turned so she lay against him, their eyes meeting. one of his legs slipped between hers and they lay comfortably.

"You're still all vampy." She told him. Spike raised an eyebrow and raised a hand to feel the ridges. He hadn't noticed, which was strange. He hadn't been unconscious of his vampire mask since he had first been turned. He was about to change back into his human form when he Buffy raised her hand and touched the ridges over his eyes.

"What are you doing?" He asked softly, and Buffy dropped her hand quickly, as if catching herself.

"Just...nothing." She replied, remembering touching Angel's vampire face once before, much the same way. Buffy got up and started looking for her clothes, "I really do have to go. It's light out and Dawn will be leaving for school soon."

Spike watched her dress, turning back into his human face, "Right. And you have work."

"Yeah." She grabbed her bag again, "I'll...see you."

Spike sighed as she left, and fell back against the pillows, feeling disappointed and almost saddened by her departure. 

"I love you." He muttered, closing his eyes and drifting off to a restless sleep.


	2. What Friends Are For

**Chapter 12**

**2002**

****

Buffy slammed the lid down on the toilet and flushed. She wiped her mouth with a towel and leaned her forehead against the edge of the bathroom sink. She brought one hand up to her head. She was still nauseous, and slightly dizzy. A knock at the door brought her back to reality a bit.

"Buffy?" Dawn's voice came through the door muffled, "You OK?"

"Yeah..." Buffy hauled herself off the floor, "I've just...got the flu or somethin'."

"Do you need something?"

"No, thanks, Dawnie. You have school in like ten minutes. Don't worry about me." She opened the door, "See? I'm just fine."

Dawn studied her sister's face, "You look ill."

"I am." the Slayer groaned, moving past her sister and going to her bedroom. Dawn followed.

"I could take off from school and take care of you!"

"Nice try. Have a nice day. Willow will make sure I'm OK after her class."

Dawn sighed and left, leaving Buffy to bury her face in her pillow. Buffy took a deep breath, trying to let the woozy-ness pass. Willow peeked in the doorway, "How're you doin'?"

"Dawn told you?"

"Yup. I'm supposed to take care of you."

"I just told her that to get her to stop worrying." Buffy said, sitting up in bed, "Willow, something's...way wrong."

Willow's brow furrowed and she sat next to Buffy on the bed, "What is it?"

"I skipped my period, and now I'm all sick in the mornings," the Slayer said slowly, "But...I haven't--"

"Maybe it's just a hormone thing or something." Willow offered.

"Yeah, but I have this feeling something Hellmouthy is going on."

"Buffy, if you haven't...you know...with anyone, it's really not possible. Right?"

"Well, that's not entirely true."

"Um, did I miss something in sex Ed? Because--"

"Not that part. I've been...with someone. But he's...sterile, I guess you could say."

"Sterile? Wait, why didn't you tell me--" Willow broke off, her eyes growing wide, "Sterile. Sex with, a sterile--And you didn't tell me. Angel's back?!"

"No!" Buffy exclaimed, "Emphatic, NO! Curse? Soul? Losing of the soul? No!"

"Then who--" The red-head's eyes widened once again, "Spike. Ohmygoddess, you're having sex with Spike?"

Buffy's eyes welled with tears and she looked down, "Yeah."

"Oh, Buffy...Don't cry..." Willow put a comforting hand on her friend's shoulder, "It's OK. Spike's...not all that bad."

"I just...I don't know what to do anymore, Will. He loves me. But I don't know..."

"You don't know if you love him back."

"Yeah. And it hurts. I thought, at first, that somehow, I came back wrong. Because he could hurt me without the chip acting up. And I blamed my...relationship with him on that. But Tarah said I wasn't wrong."

"Tarah?" The hurt was evident in Willow's eyes and immediately Buffy felt sorry for not telling Willow sooner.

  
"Willow, I only went to Tarah because I didn't want to you mixed up in magic of any kind--"

"It's OK." Willow said, "I understand that. But why didn't you tell me about Spike?"

"I don't know. I was afraid you guys would reject me?"

"Reject you? Over Spike? Why?"

"He's evil. He doesn't have a soul. Just the chip." Buffy looked down at her hands, "I guess I also liked keeping it secret. It felt dangerous. It felt good."

Willow took one of Buffy's hands in hers, "It's OK, Buffy. I'm not all that surprised, really. You guys are almost right for each other."

"You think?"

"Yep. I think."

Buffy smiled a little through her tears, "But what about this...thing?"

"Maybe we should, you know, get one of those test thingies. Just to be absolutely positively sure."

Buffy smiled and hugged Willow tightly, "Thanks, Willow. So much."

**2003**

****

Buffy came out of the bedroom carrying Cassandra and two bags. She found Spike in the living room, fiddling with the green box. She watched him for a moment, worrying for him and being slightly angry with him for pushing her away.

"Spike, we're packed." She said, coming the rest of the way into the living room.

He set the box aside and jumped up to help her with the bags, "I'm sorry." He blurted, setting the bags aside. "I don't want you to leave, but I want you two to be safe. Just in case."

"What about you?"

"Don't worry about it." He said softly, kissing her gently on the lips, "If it wasn't safe, I'd go with you."

"Can't you at least tell me what's going on?"

"No, luv. I'm sorry."

Buffy sighed and would have protested had she not seen the certainty in his eyes. There had been times like this before, where she knew she just had to trust him, and vise versa. She hated it, but it was something she had to get over, because Spike got downright stubborn sometimes.

"I love you." She whispered, leaning up to kiss him again. He kissed her back, stroking her hair gently.

"Love you, too." He said when they broke apart. He kissed Cassandra's forehead, "I love you, little one. Be good."

Buffy kissed his cheek before grabbing the bags and heading out the door to the car.


	3. Hurtful Words

**Chapter 3**

**2003**

****

Spike looked down at the green, velvet-covered box on the table. He knew what was in it. A simple piece of paper that would turn his world upside down. When read, the piece of paper wreaked havoc on the mind, body, on every one of the senses. It was a torture devised by monks in the early 1300's who wanted to punish those who betrayed them. Back when he had been with Dru, Spike had heard of nothing but this piece of paper for over a decade, before her obsession faded. Then, less than a year ago, Drusilla had returned and promised she would find it to punish Spike for betraying her with The Slayer. He would pay dearly for it, by receiving the curse. 

Sure, he could just let it sit, not open it. But the pull of the energy in the box would force him to open it. Men, vampires, demons stronger than Spike had gone mad trying to stay away from it, which was probably better than the 24 hours of torture that would rain down on the if they opened the box.

_Time to face facts_, Spike thought, and picked up the box.

**2002**

****

Spike wasn't surprised when the crypt door opened and Buffy stepped inside. She came over all the time during the day, so this wasn't out of the ordinary. But today was different. Usually, the door was kicked open, or opened with a slam, then she would come at him in a frenzy. In the early days, as Spike liked to call them, she would beat the living Hell out of him. Lately, she had kissed him senseless before they fell to the floor in a tumble of limbs. Today she was quiet. The door opened and shut almost soundlessly and she stood completely still.

"Slayer? Something wrong?" He asked, studying her carefully. She wore an old pair of jeans and a well-worn t-shirt. He hair was slightly messy and she hadn't put on any make-up. She was still absolutely edible, but her appearance unnerved him. Something was going on with her.

"Spike, there's something I've got to tell you, and you're going to be...I don't know what you're going to be."

Spike sat down on the tattered couch in the center of the crypt, "Start talking." He said simply, hands resting on his knees.

"Spike...I'm pregnant."

Hurt, anger, confusion, and pain flitted across his features before he stood. He was silent and still for a long moment, arms crossed over his chest.

"Say something. Please." Buffy pleaded, her eyes filling with tears as he searched his face, which had gone blank.

"Whose is it?" He demanded, icy eyes meeting hers in a steely gaze.

Buffy stepped back as if she'd been slapped, "What?"

"Well I'm not really fertile, Slayer. So who else have you been screwing?"

Buffy made a face of disgust, the hurt she felt indescribable. Anger boiled inside her, "How could you say that?"

"Easily." He muttered coldly, "I'm just your sex toy, right?"

She let out a cry of rage before her fist connected with his face, sending him sprawling back onto the couch. He looked up at her in shock as tears streamed down her beautiful, but gaunt face.

"How dare you, you evil bastard." She sobbed, "Don't treat me like...some whore who sleeps with everything with a dick between its legs. So you know, Spike, I'm carrying your demon spawn. I don't know how, or why. But I AM. And I don't want you anywhere near it. UNDERSTAND?"

Spike was shocked into silence as she choked back a sob and ran from the crypt, leaving him alone.

**2003**

****

Buffy sat in Willow and Tara's apartment, Cassandra sound asleep in her lap. Willow had been awake, reading over books for an upcoming mid-term. The witch, who was now practicing magic, little by little again, was sitting across from Buffy, a cup of herbal tee between her palms.

"Sorry to crash your study night." Buffy said, "But something was seriously up with Spike."

"He actually made you leave? What was it?"

"He got this package, said he didn't want me and Cassandra near it. He said he was safe, but we weren't."

"I don't get it."

"Me neither. But that pesky intuition of mine kicked in and I had to trust him." Buffy said, taking a sip of her coffee.

"Hm. Well, I'm sure it's ok. Your intuition is usual right on the money. It's actually kinda scary."

Buffy smiled. She rocked Cassandra gently as the baby fussed in her arms, "Willow? Do you remember the day I told Spike I was pregnant?"

"Do I?! Of course. That was one hell of a day. And night."

The blonde smiled, "I don't know why I thought of that. It just came to mind, suddenly."

"Spike reacted badly." Willow remembered, "That moment when you came back to the house, crying, screaming, throwing things, is one thing I will never forget."

"I went a little Jack Nicholson ala The Shining, didn't I?"

"Yup. Slayer-style."

Buffy laughed softly, "God, that feels like so long ago..."

**2002**

****

Buffy stopped, looking around the semi-trashed living room.

"Feel better?" Willow asked meekly from the couch, and Buffy nodded before collapsing in a sobbing heap.

Willow rushed to her side, taking Buffy's trembling body in her arms, running her hand in soothing circles over her back, like a mother to a child, "Shh. Buffy don't cry. It's gonna be fine."

"But it won't." Buffy sobbed, "It never will be. The consequences of this are huge, Will. Dawn could get taken away. I can't support her, and a baby. And HOW? How did this even happen?"

Willow shook her head, "We're looking into it. Tarah and I, that is. She's the only one I told. I needed help researching. But we can't find any instances...Can you remember anything from the past month or so that may have worked some freaky mojo on you guys?"

Buffy wiped away her tears and got herself together somewhat, "Let me think...Nothing really changed, I guess. It was...sex. Almost meaningless, but never quite. There were never any magical elements around, ever."

"What about demons? Or even suspicious looking people who may have--"

"Demons! Demons, and Spike cut his hand."

"You lost me, Buff."

"It was a month ago." Buffy recounted, "We were...making out, I guess. When these three demons just showed up. We fought them off, and one cut Spike with a dagger. They bled, some and maybe the blood got into the cut."

"What'd they look like?"

"Ugh. Greenish blue, three horns on their heads, two on the chin. They had ring piercings in the horns and their noses."

"Uh...gross. And you and Spike had sex after?"

"Yeah..." Buffy blushed faintly, "We should look into the demons."

"Definitely." Willow nodded, "I'll call Tarah and have her meet us at the Magic Box."****


	4. I Love You

**Chapter 4**

**2002**

****

"There's our guy." Willow said, showing Tarah and Buffy the picture, "Right?"

Buffy nodded, "What is it?"

"The Arg Iav demon. They're particularly nasty. It says here they're heart-eating demons. Ew. Oh, here's the important part. Back in the day, Arg Iav blood was used as a strong fertility drug. There you go. Spike's fertile. Or was. We can't be sure."

Buffy leaned back, "God, I hate my life."

Tarah and Willow looked at eachother, then Tarah turned to Buffy, "Sweetie, what...what exactly happened with Spike?"

"Without the throwing this time. Please." Willow said quietly, a small smile on her lips.

"He...he thought I was sleeping with someone else. A human. He wasn't very nice. He was cruel, actually and I hit him, and told him the baby was his. And I left. It didn't go well." She closed her eyes, "I don't know what I'm gonna do. Who even knows if this baby's going to be born human."

Willow covered Buffy's hand with hers, "We'll help find out. In the meantime, what about telling everyone?"

"They should know." Buffy agreed, "I may as well tell the whole story, too."

Tarah smiled reassuringly, "You told me. And now, Willow. It'll be easier this time."

Willow tried not to look too uncomfortable at the mention of Tarah knowing before her, shaking off the feeling. "Want me to call an official Scooby Meeting?"

"Could you?" Buffy said gratefully.

"Not a problem." Willow said, getting up. She patted Buffy's shoulder as she passed and smiled over her shoulder at Tarah.

Later, as the sun was setting, Xander, Anya, Dawn, Tarah, Willow, and Buffy were assembled in the Summers living room. Xander and Anya curled up in the overstuffed armchair, Dawn sat with Willow on the sofa, and Tarah leaned against the wall. Buffy stood in front of them all, afraid, nervous, and thousands of other emotions.

"I have to tell you guys something." She said slowly, "And it's really...it's gonna made some of you mad. But please, I've had...a really long, painful day. I need you to just listen. Then you can yell, k?"

They all nodded, excluding Tarah and Willow.

"Is everything OK?" Dawn asked, her brow creased with worry. Willow patted her hand.

"It's fine, Dawnie." Buffy said, "But something really big's going on. And you all should know. OK. Spike and I have been...we've been involved for the past few months. It's hard to explain, but we've been seeing eachother for a while. About a month ago we were attacked by a group of demons called Arg Iav. Their blood has fertility...stuff in it. Spike got some of the blood mixed with his...and something happened." She paused, realized none of them knew what she meant, and went on, "I'm pregnant."

There was deafening silence as three shocked gazes focused on her.

Xander got up and left to room. Anya stayed still. Dawn stood and stepped in front of Buffy.

"You're gonna have a baby?"

"Yeah."

The younger sister, eyes full of uncertainty, hugged her. "Buffy...Why didn't you at least...say something?"

"Lots of reasons." Buffy whispered, hugging her tightly back, "I'm sorry."

"It's OK...But, what happens now?"

"I don't know, Dawn. I'm sorry but, I just...don't know this time. But it'll straighten out, I promise."

"I know." Dawn said and kissed Buffy on the cheek, "Love you."

"Love you, too. Thanks for not being mad at me."

"You're my sister, Buffy. And I'm gonna be an aunt. It's...weird. But I can't be mad."

Xander returned from the kitchen, "Sorry. Needed a moment."

"S'OK, Xand." Buffy said, turning away from Dawn and facing him uncertainly, "Well?"

"It's...really, really, really, weird." He said slowly, "But I'll deal. What about you, though?"

"I honestly have no clue." She said softly, "Spike didn't take the news well."

Buffy turned to say something to Willow, when Anya hurled herself at her, gripping the Slayer in a tight hug. Buffy grunted in surprise, then patted Anya awkwardly on the back.

"Thanks, An...Oxygen becoming an issue."

Anya let go, "Sorry. But...yay!"

"What?" Buffy whispered, an eyebrow rising.

"Haven't you even...thought of the good parts? I swear, sometimes you people are so pessimistic. I know it's bad. It's horribly bad. But, Buffy, it's a _baby_."

Buffy fell silent. Tears filled her eyes as Anya's words hit home. She had treated this like an issue to be solved up until now. But the ex-demon was right. It was a baby, growing inside her. She was going to be a mother. Someone's mom. Buffy looked up at Anya and smiled as the tears spilled over onto her cheeks, "I'm a mom."

Anya nodded, and opened her arms for another hug. Buffy accepted it openly, hugging this person who she had never really liked, who had just cleared things up for her, "Thank you, Anya."

"You're welcome." Anya said, backing away.

The room was quiet and everyone sat down, staring at eachother uncertainly, "So...What now, guys?"

No one spoke, and the room was silent again until the front door slammed open. Spike stormed in, black duster billowing behind him. He stopped, looked around at them all, then ignored them all and walked straight to Buffy. He fell to his knees in front of her, and met her eyes in a long stare. 

Buffy saw the tears glistening in the ice-blue depths of his eyes, and he let out a trembling sigh.

"I'm sorry." He said shakily as the tears trickled down his pale cheeks, "I'm sorry."

He laid his head in her lap, sobbing and apologizing over and over. Buffy stared at the top of his head, then brought her hands up, stroking his tousled hair. Her own tears fell silently as she gently lifted his head up. He leaned up and kissed her gently, sweetly. They had never, ever kissed like that before in all the breath-taking moments they'd had. They had never shared a kiss so soft, almost chaste.

"I love you." He whispered to her, then leaned his forehead on her abdomen, "I love you."

Everyone else was silent, watching the tender scene unfold. Buffy bent down, resting her head on his, "I love you, Spike."


	5. Proposals

**Chapter 5**

**2003**

****

Spike stared at the box. He was scared to death, a feeling he certainly wasn't used to. He had only felt this way twice before. The first was when Dru was taken by the mob in Prague. The second time was the day Cassandra was born. Now, the feeling settled in his gut, and every time he looked at the box, it got worse. He knew that opening that box would be like cursing himself with a soul, among other things. He would feel guilt for the things he'd done, suffer for his past wrongdoings. The pain he got from the chip was nothing compared to the pain the curse would send on him.

The probability of survival wasn't all that great for a mortal. Vampires had staked themselves before, just to end the pain. Spike closed his eyes. The curse lasted 24 hours. He had endured torture before, and he had worked to hard to let Dru's idea of a practical joke ruin the life he had finally gotten.

**2002**

****

Buffy slid into the kitchen chair across from Spike, casting a quick glance at the kitchen door. She had no doubts that the rest of the gang was trying to listen in on the conversation. 

"How long have you known?" Spike asked, his voice quiet, his eyes were still red from crying.

"Almost a day. And it's been one hell of a day."

"I shouldn't have said those things to you earlier." He said, and it was obvious that he was mentally beating himself up for it, "I don't have a right to--"

"Spike, don't. You apologized already, and I won't let you punish yourself for a reaction that really wasn't all that unpredictable." Buffy said, taking his hand and running her thumb over his fingers, "Besides, I'm starting to get used to the idea, and you should, too."

"You mean...you want me to be a part of its life?"  
  


"Of course." She whispered. The pause that followed was full of unasked questions that just couldn't be answered, so she took a deep breath, "I love you."  
  


"Do you mean that, though?" He said, his voice cold around the edges, "Or are you trying to convince yourself to make having this baby seem easier?"

Buffy took her hand away from his, and he immediately regretted saying anything. She fidgeted with her hands in her lap, "Spike, I've tried not to feel anything for you, except maybe hate. But I can't hate you, because when I felt like I was still dead you made me feel alive. You make me feel, period. And because of you I went on living in the world instead of just going through the motions. I know I sound like some made for TV movie, but it's true."

Spike looked away, "So you don't hate me. That doesn't equal love, Buffy."

"No, but I started to respect you, Spike. Then I actually started liking you. LIKING, for God's sake. I got scared, because I didn't understand how I could like someone who should be my sworn enemy." Buffy took a breath, and studied his face for a moment, "So I went to Tarah to find out if maybe something was wrong with me, like you said in that alley. When there wasn't I had to start facing the fact that maybe you had changed, and maybe I was falling for you.

"I fought my feelings harder than I've fought ANTHING. But when you love someone, it doesn't just go away. You should know that as well as anyone." 

Spike stood up and moved around the table to her, pulling her to him in a crushing hug. Her arms circled his slender waist under his duster and she leaned her cheek against his chest.

"I love you, Slayer. You're a strange bird. But I love you."

Buffy laughed through tears that were beginning to gather at the corners of her eyes, "Leave it to you to turn a serious moment into a joke." She wiped at the tears, "All this crying can not be good for my skin."

Spike smiled and kissed a tear away, "Then stop crying." He murmured, and lowered his lips to hers.

**2003**

****

Buffy sighed, a far off look on her face, "He surprised us all that day."

"Yeah." Willow agreed with a smirk, "Spike cried. I saw Spike cry when Dru dumped him. But I think he was more or less crying because his pride was hurt. When he showed up at the house that day...wow."

"Almost human, right?"

"Exactly."

Buffy took her coffee mug to the sink, and then checked on Cassandra, who was sleeping peacefully in her carrier. "Then the next night, he shocked us all again."

**2002**

****

The Bronze was packed the next night, and the entire Scooby Gang had decided to come and dance the worries away, just for one night as a stress reliever from the past two days. Anya and Xander were on the dance floor already, while Tarah and Willow went on a drink run. Buffy hung her jacket on the back of a chair and smiled over at Spike, weighed down with everyone else's jackets. He dropped them in a chair.

"Since when did I become coat lackey?" He muttered, shrugging off his duster.

"Since I'm in my delicate condition and can't handle the carrying."

Spike rolled his eyes and tugged lightly on the strap of her tank top, "You're full of it."

"Duh." She retorted, wrapping one arm around his waist and leaning into him, "Wanna dance?"

"But I thought you were too delicate?"

  
"Shut up. Come on. Please?"

Spike smiled as the music slowed down and Buffy tugged him to the dance floor. "You know," he said as they began to sway to the music and he fiddled with her tank top strap again, "You won't be able to wear these skimpy little outfits for long."

"Yeah, I know." She sighed with a mock-pout, "Will you still love me when I'm the size of the Goodyear blimp?"

Spike's eyes were serious as he bent and brushed his lips against her ear, "Always."

Buffy looked up at him for a moment, and then buried her face in his neck, breathing in his scent. Nicotine, peppermint, and leather mixed with cologne. She placed gentle kisses on his neck until he growled low in his throat.

"I'll drag you out of here if I have to." He warned and she smiled and leaned her cheek on his shoulder.

_Find me here  
speak to me  
I want to feel you  
I need to hear you  
you are the light  
that is leading me  
to the place where  
I find peace again_

Willow nudged Tarah as they waited for the tray of drinks, and pointed over at Buffy and Spike on the dance floor. Tarah smiled, "They look good together don't they?"

"Yeah." Willow whispered, "It's gonna be hard for them."

"They can deal, though. Spike hasn't taken his eyes off Buffy since last night. He loves her, anyone can see that."

Willow frowned a little, "Tarah?"

"What?"

"I just wanted to apologize. Again. For screwing everything up between us."

Tarah shook her head, "It's OK, Willow. You're getting better, aren't you?"

"Yeah, but--"

"That's enough for me."

_You are the strength  
that keeps me walking  
you are the hope  
that keeps me trusting  
you are the life to my soul  
you are my purpose  
you are everything  
and how can I  
stand here with you  
and not be moved by you  
would you tell me  
how could it be  
any better than this_

Spike tilted Buffy's chin so she was looking up at him, "Do me a favor, luv?"

"What is it?"

"Trust me."

Buffy's eyebrows came together in a frown, "Trust you?"

"You said once that you would never trust me. Has that changed?"

"Yes," she whispered, "I trust you, Spike. I just have to. I don't know why I suddenly do. Something in me just tells me to have faith in you."

Spike kissed her gently then said, "I guess we've turned into a normal couple."

"Not normal. Never normal." Buffy said it with a smile, which surprised Spike a little. She ran her fingers through his hair; "Normal isn't even in my vocabulary anymore."

Spike held her closer and breathed in the scent of her shampoo, looking over her shoulder, "They're back with the drinks."

Buffy stepped away from him reluctantly and they headed back to the table.

You calm the storms  
you give me rest  
you hold me in your hands  
you won't let me fall  
you still my heart  
and you take my breath away

Everyone sipped their drinks (Spike added blood to his from the flask in his jacket) and talked around the table, mostly about Xander and Anya's wedding.

  
"What colors have you decided on for the wedding party?" Willow asked, stirring her ice.

"You, Buffy, and Tarah will be wearing light yellow and Dawn's going to wear pink because I decided to make her my maid of honor."

"Really? She never mentioned anything to me." Buffy said.

"I haven't asked her yet. But in the past few weeks since she started working off her…debt at the magic shop, we've been talking a lot and I think it would be nice. I like her." Anya paused, "She's a lot older than I thought."

Spike leaned over to Buffy, "I'm going to ask you something, and it would help if you said yes."

"That depends on what you're asking."

"I want to marry you."

Buffy froze, her drink halfway to her lips. She set the glass down with a clink and looked at him, "You what?"

"I shouldn't have said anything. Never mind."

"No. You can't just "never mind" a proposal." Buffy whispered, "That's like…I don't know what it's like but you can't do it!"

She got up, grabbed her jacket, excused herself for some air and hurried out of the club. Spike mumbled an excuse and followed her.

"Why did you leave?" He demanded, finding her leaning against the outside of the building.

"You just proposed to me!"

"I know."

"In the Bronze!"

"I know."

"With EVERYONE there!"

"I know, Slayer. But I just…I used bad judgment. Big surprise. But I was going to ask you anyway, didn't really matter where."

"Vampires don't get married."

"This one does."

"You can't! You can't do the church thing, because holy water WILL be involved. A wedding just won't work."

"Then we won't have a wedding." He insisted, "If we have to we can go to a Justice if the Peace and do it that way. But I want…I don't know what I want."

Buffy sagged against the wall, "Spike, I'm yours, whether it's legally binding or not."

He turned and looked at her, "Maybe I'm getting a bloody soul, because I'm turning into a sentimental poof."

She giggled, "That's not so bad, though."

Spike smirked, "Angelus'd be laughing his bloody arse off if he could see me now."

Buffy wrapped her arms around his neck, "Do you want to marry me? For real?"

"Forever, pet."

Buffy shook her head, "You really are a strange vampire."

He smirked then took her mouth in a passionate kiss. She returned it full-force, leaning into the embrace hungrily. This was what she wanted, and she finally had it at her fingertips. 

Would you take me in  
would you take me deeper now  
'cause you're all I want  
you are all I need  
you are everything  
everything

_And how can I  
stand here with you  
and not be moved by you  
would you tell me  
how could it be  
any better than this_


	6. It's a Wedding! #1

**Chapter 6**

**2003**

****

Spike looked out the window, into the night. It was dark and peaceful on Revello Drive. The houses were all dark or dimly lit, the streetlights the only form of light on the sidewalks and roads. People slept peacefully, oblivious to the evil that surrounded them.

"Hell," Spike whispered, "Evil lives just across the street."

He smirked and rolled his eyes at himself, "I've got to stop this broody Angel-itis I've got going."

He let the curtain fall, blocking his view of the street and turned back to the tiny green box. He turned it over in his hands and studied it. The color made him remember something. A day not so long ago. He sighed and sat down and let himself be reminded.

**2002******

Buffy got out of the car and adjusted her sunglasses on the bridge of her nose. She and Dawn were coming back from the hairdresser's, after getting their hair done in preparation for Xander and Anya's wedding. Willow and Tarah were on the porch, sorting through magic books and spell ingredients.

"How go the wedding spells?" Dawn called out as she got out of the driver's seat. She had gotten her license recently, a blessing considering Buffy was a life long pedestrian.

  
"Good." Willow replied as the sisters came up the steps to the porch, "How'd the hair appointment go?"

"Beautifully, I'd guess." Tarah commented, "Very nice."

"Thank you, very much." Dawn said with an exaggerated curtsy, "You guys have appointments in an hour, don't forget."

"Yes, mom." Willow said, "You're starting to sound like Anya."

"I hang around her too much." Dawn agreed before going inside.

"T minus three hours and counting." Buffy said, sitting next to Willow, "Till we get this show on the road."

"Yup. We're working on a luck and love spell for them." Tarah said, "How're you feeling today?"

"Way less woozy, thankfully." Buffy said, "And very glad I can fit into my dress. No showage yet."

Willow smiled, "Well, it'll come soon so don't get too excited."

Buffy frowned, "So not looking forward to giving up my entire wardrobe for a few months. Spike things it's just wonderful. Ever since he moved in he's been running around like a little kid, all excited. I'm just having a hard time explaining to him that he's gonna be waiting another 7 months."

Willow and Tarah laughed. Buffy excused herself to go inside and see how pre-wedding plans were going.

"Bloody HELL!"

"Nice to see you, too." Buffy said, turning to shut the door. She had heard Spike's voice before she'd seen him, "What's the prob--Oh my GOD."

Her jaw dropped as he came downstairs in a pair of dress pants and a half-buttoned white shirt, bow tie dangling un-tied around his neck, tux jacket over his arm.

"You look like a Ralph Lauren ad." She breathed, "I just might have to drag you upstairs and--"

"Can't. You'll ruin your hair." He cut in, "Anya would stake me on site. I look like a waiter."

"No...You look amazing." She finished buttoning his shirt for him and tied the bow tie, "You look all blond-James Bond-ey."

"You have some strange vocabulary, pet." He said, then kissed her quickly on the lips, "I've gotta go. The sun's down and I gotta get to Xander's to meet him and that Mark bloke. You look beautiful, by the way."

"Thanks much." She said, "See you at the wedding."

"Bye, baby." He paused halfway out the door, "I refuse to wear one of these at our wedding."

The door slammed and Buffy heard Willow and Tarah catcalling as Spike jogged down the porch steps. She giggled and hurried upstairs to see what Anya and Dawn were up to.

**2003**

****

"Remember Xander and Anya's wedding?" Willow asked, taking the sheet of cookies out of the oven, "That was...a trip."

"Yeah." Buffy laughed, taking a bite out of a cookie from the first batch, "Ohmigod, Will, these are soooo good!"

"Late-night baking. My specialty."

Buffy smiled and grabbed another one.

"I smell cookies." Tarah half-spoke half-yawned as she came out of the bedroom, stretching her arms over her head, "Good...almost morning."

"'Morning, Tarah." Buffy chirped, a little hopped up on coffee and cookies.

Tarah kissed Willow on the cheek, "What's going on?"

"Spike has a thing." Willow said, "Said thing is unknown."

"I see." Tarah said and took a cookie, "What're we talking about?"

"Xander and Anya's wedding." Buffy replied.

**2002**

****

Xander fidgeted nervously at the altar. He reached up to fiddle with his tie again, but quickly dropped his hands as the music started. First to come out was Xander's little cousin Angela, the flower girl. She sprinkled pink and yellow rose petals and baby's breath on the white satin carpet as soft flute music played. Next, Dawn came on Mark's arm. She wore a form-fitting, flowy pink dress that reached the ground and a sheer wrap that matched. Her hair fell in loose curls over her shoulders with little sparkling jewels threaded through. She smiled at Xander and gave him a wink before standing on the bride's side and Mark stood beside Xander. Next, Willow and Tarah came together, hands linked. They wore the same dress as dawn in pale pink. Willow's hair was down and natural, with tiny braids placed one on the left, and one on the right, thin ribbons woven in. Tarah's hair fell in waves, a flower matching the white roses in her bouquet tucked behind one ear. Finally, Buffy came on Spike's arm, her face glowing as she grinned at Xander. He hair was pulled back and clipped in a sparkly barrette, the ends curling under. She gave him the thumbs up as she joined the rest of the bride's maids.

The music switched to the bridal march as Anya came down the aisle on Giles' arm. Giles had flown in from England for the wedding. Buffy looked at him with a smile, feeling bad for not giving him the full story about her and Spike. But she had wanted Xander and Anya's wedding to go off without a hitch, so she was saving the news about the pregnancy and Spike proposing for later.

Giles kissed Anya on the cheek and placed her hand in Xander's, and the ceremony began.

After the ceremony, which went with tears from both the bride and groom, the reception was held at the Sunnydale Regent Hotel, in one of the halls.

"Oh Slaaayyyer."

Buffy felt strong arms go around her waist and she turned her head and smiled at Spike, "What do you want? Anya's doing the money dance, go give her your cash."

He shook his head and brought his left hand up to her eyes, a ring between his thumb and forefinger, "I realized, a few days ago that I never gave you and engagement ring."  
  


Buffy gasped and took the ring from him, laying it in the palm of her hand, "It's gorgeous."

The ring, which was an emerald flanked by two small heart shaped diamonds, was on a platinum band.

"The green matches your eyes." He whispered, kissing the skin behind her ear, "You like it?"

"I love it!" She whispered, letting him slide it on her finger, "I love you. So much."

She tilted her head so he could kiss her, and their lips met briefly before they were interrupted by a clearing throat.

"You two have GOT to stop before someone gets sick."

"Shut up, Xander." Buffy said, holding up her hand, "Look."

"Wow. Very nice." He looked at Spike, "Told you she'd like it."

"He helped." Spike explained.

"You two are the best. I love you both."

"Yeah, but Spike's the one who gets kisses from the Buf." Xander sighed, pouting.

Buffy laughed and slapped him playfully; "Go to your wife, now, before I murder you."

He winked at them before walking off.

**2003**

****

Spike sighed and set the box back down. The color was a lot like the ring that Buffy wore, and it only made the pain at thinking about going through with opening the box even worse. He sighed and went back to the window and looked out. The sunrise was only hours away, he could sense it. He picked up the box and went to the basement, making sure the door was locked before he descended the dark stairs.


	7. The Other Slayer

**Chapter 7**

**2003**

****

Spike looked around the dimly lit basement. It was pretty open, and the windows had long ago been boarded up. It was safe down here. He locked the door behind him, making sure that once the effects of the curse took their toll, he couldn't leave the basement. He wouldn't go running off into the sunlight. He set the box down and crossed the room to the shelves. He took down a box marked 'Pictures--PUT IN ALBUMS!'. Buffy had been determined to sort and paste the pictures into albums, which had never happened. He sat on the floor and opened the box. The first packet was labeled "Xander & Anya's wedding". Spike slid the stack of photos out. The first one made him smirk. It was of Giles, looking rather flustered, hugging Buffy outside the reception hall, just after Xander and Anya had left. Spike remembered the moment well.

**2002**

****

Buffy was afraid to face Giles. She pulled her wrap around her shoulders and glanced around the well-lit gardens outside the hotel. She gathered her strength as her former Watcher stepped outside.

"You wanted to speak to me?" He asked, cleaning his glasses and taking a seat in one of the lattice-work garden chairs.

"Right." Buffy said shakily, sitting across from him. "Giles, I love you like a father."

He smiled warmly, "You know I think of you as my...daughter I never had."

"That means I'm gonna get the angry dad reaction on this." Buffy said nervously, "I have something to tell you. Considering you took my relationship with Spike so well, I don't know if I should worry...Anyway, I should've told you before but Anya didn't want bad vibes at the wedding and I knew you'd be--"

"Buffy. You're rambling."

"Sorry." The Slayer paused and breathed a moment, "OK. Giles, I'm three months pregnant."

The Watcher fell absolutely silent.

"And um...Spike and I are engaged." Buffy flinched, waiting for the lecture, but it never came.

"Do you love him? I mean, really, Buffy. Do you see yourself spending your entire life with Spike...and a child?"

"Yes." She breathed, "God help me, but yes. I can't imagine it any other way."

"How?" Giles pushed his glasses up, "A vampire reproducing is...is...unheard of."

"There was a Arg Iav demon, and its blood mixed with Spike's, making him fertile. It was a gigantic shock to everyone when it happened, and I'm sorry I didn't tell you. But I couldn't let you know over the phone."

"Oh, Buffy." Giles sighed, "And you thought I would be angry."

"Well, yeah. I'm only 21, and Spike's...he's Spike." She paused, "I screwed, up didn't I?"

"No. You lived. Yow did what no Slayer has ever done. I'm almost proud."

"Really?"

"I said almost." He said sharply, but with a smile.

"Giles, I know you're supposed to go back to England in a week," Buffy said, "But the wedding is in a month and a half, and since my father doesn't even know, and I doubt he'll bother to take off work for my wedding anyway...Give me away?"

Giles was quiet, and then pulled his Slayer to him in a crushing hug, "I would be so honored." He whispered.

Behind them, a shutter clicked and flash went off, but neither noticed.

**2003**

**City Of Angels**

****

****

Dawn came through the double doors to Angel Investigations, followed closely by Fred and Cordelia.

"Ohmigod, you guys that was AWESOME!" Dawn gushed. They had just returned from an all-night grand-re-re-opening of Caritas. After a year of being closed, the inter-species karaoke club was back and better than ever.

"Yeah, too bad Angel, Gunn and Wes had to run off." Fred said, "This has been so fun."

Moments later, the men of Angel Investigation traipsed in, covered in mud and green slime.

"Ew. You guys reek." Cordelia said, holding her nose with her fingers.

  
"Gee, thanks." Gunn retorted, "Damn demons. Always bleedin' on my clothes."

The group looked up as a brunette came down the stairs, carrying Connor, "Look who's home, buddy." She crooned to the baby, handing him over to Cordelia."

"Thanks for watching him, Faith." Angel said, "I'm gonna go take a shower before I hold him."

"How was he?" Cordelia asked Faith, kissing the baby's forehead.

"Total angel." Faith joked. She smiled softly. It felt good to be with these people, talking as if they had been friends forever...

"I'm going to wash up..." Wesley mumbled. He pecked Faith on the cheek before going upstairs. Gunn followed him, leaving the four women.

"I'm gonna go get some sleep." Dawn said, "I gotta go back to Dad's tomorrow. He thinks I'm staying with a friend."

"When do you go back to Sunny-D?" Faith asked.

"About a month. Figure Buffy and Spike can have nice, loud, obnoxious sex for a little longer before I go back."

Faith smothered a giggle, "Well, I guess I'll see you in the morning Dawn...Oh, and I meant to tell you, another college application came in the mail."

"Which one?"

"NYU."

"Ooooh, awesome!" Dawn jumped up and down, "Dad is totally against NYU. Remind me to thank Angel for letting me have them sent here."

"It's on your night table." Faith said, watching her go.

She sighed, remembering returning to Sunnydale to find the world backwards...

**2002**

****

Buffy took the pot off the stove and poured the noodles into the strainer, "I am getting soooo good at this cooking thing!"

"So she thinks." Dawn muttered, setting the table with Spike. The vampire smothered his laugh and shook his head at her.

"When do they all get here?" He asked, "So I can have a smoke without Willow jumping on my back."

"No, no, no." Buffy said, "No smoking around me while I'm pregnant, and even after the baby's born."

He rolled his eyes, "You have me whipped."

"Yup." She said sweetly with a syrupy smile.

There was knock on the door, and Dawn ran to open it, expecting Willow and Tarah, but getting someone she hadn't seen in ages.

"Oh my god, Faith." She whispered.

"Hey, D." The ex-rogue-Slayer said, "Can I come in?"


	8. Catching Up

**2002  
Sunnydale**

Dawn blinked twice and stepped aside to let the dark-haired Slayer pass. She wasn't about to try to fight off Faith on her own. "Um...Spike? Buffy? Someone?"  
  
Two blond heads poked into the room, and Buffy frowned, "Dawnie, what is--"  
  
In a matter of seconds, Buffy was in front of Faith, her face frozen in a mask of stone, "Get out of my house, Faith."  
  
"B., please. Don't freak out." Faith pleaded, and Buffy noticed for the first time how small the other Slayer looked.  
  
"Faith?" She whispered, "What's going on?"  
  
"Uh, parole, actually." Faith replied, "I could've gone to Angel, but I heard he had some stuff going on, and I had no place else to go." She shivered, and Dawn shut the door.  
  
"Who's the shaky bird?" Spike whispered, watching as the two Slayers stared at eachother.  
  
"Faith. Used to be a psycho. Other Slayer."  
  
"Oh..." Spike nodded, getting a flash of the past ("Dark hair, yay tall. Name of Faith. Criminally insane.").  
  
"So..." Buffy shifted, "How are you doing since...well, forever ago?"  
  
"Five by five." Faith muttered, "Look, I just need someplace to sleep for the night. If you want, call Angel, he'll let you know you're safe."  
  
Buffy shook her head, "Faith..."  
  
"Please, Buffy."  
  
The blond looked away for a second, then back to the woman who was such the opposite of herself, "OK. You can stay here."  
  
Faith allowed herself a tiny twitch of a smile. "Thanks. Who's the guy in the leather?"  
  
"Oh, now, that's a loooong story." Buffy said with a slow smile. She glanced back at Spike to find him heading back to the kitchen, oven mitt in hand. She could hear him muttering something about being domesticated. Buffy looked back at Faith, "I'll tell you all of it, soon."

**2003  
Los Angeles**

Faith stood in the doorway of the bedroom she shared with Wesley, watching him dry his hair from the shower. His bare chest rippled with every movement, and she could see the scars from various battles standing out, white against the tan of his skin. She pushes back the usual guilt that always hits her every time she sees those scars, when she remembers the ones she caused herself. She shut her eyes tightly and tried to wipe visions of that night so, so long ago.  
  
_Wesley was in pain. She could see that, and she was satisfied. He was tied and gagged in a chair, his face covered in bruises, his body scattered with tiny cuts. Faith slowly paced in front of him, her boots making dull thudding sound with every heavy step. She looked over at her hostage, then grinned wickedly, hopping onto his lap. Wesley's scream was muffled by the gag. She licked two of her fingers and rubbed at a cut under his eye.  
  
"All these little cuts and bruises," She murmured, so close, "just bring out the mother in me." As he slowly began to droop, she grabbed his face roughly in her hands, "Come on. Now, now, don't poop out on me, damn it! Otherwise this all just going to be over too fast, and you'll be dead and I'll be - bored. - Come on, Wesley! Where is that stiff upper lip?" She clucked her tongue and climbed off his lap "Now, we've only done one of the five basic torture groups. We've done blunt - but that still leaves sharp, cold, hot and loud. Have a preference?" Wesley looked up at her and nodded. Faith smiled and tore the gag away "Well, that's great! It's always better with audience participation. - May I take your order please?"   
  
Wesley spat on the floor to her left.  
  
"I was your Watcher, Faith. - I know the real you - and even if you kill me, there is just one thing I want you to remember."   
  
"What's that, love?"   
  
"You - are a piece of sh.."   
  
Faith interrupted him, stuffing the gag back into his mouth: "You should talk, huh? I guess I'll just have to try a little harder."   
  
She strode purposefully over to the table, picking up a picture frame. She smashed it against the surface and picked up a glass shard.  
  
"We'll switch to sharp for a while."   
  
_That was years, and years ago. An eternity, really. After jail, then the insanity that followed her parole, Faith was forced to face the past. Wesley forgave her. All she had to do was forgive herself.

**2002  
Sunnydale**

The table had an extra setting tonight. Faith's eyes were wide as she stared around the Summer's dining room, where she had eaten Christmas dinner with Joyce, her surrogate mother whom she had later tortured, all those years ago. She leaned back in her chair, and her eyes fell on the couple a few feet from her. She hadn't let the fact that Spike, as Buffy called him, was drinking blood.   
  
"You're a vampire." The Slayer blurted out suddenly and Spike gave a her a 'duh' look.  
  
"Yeah, just a little." He said with a smirk.  
  
"He's neutered." Buffy said a little smugly. Spike shot her a mock-glare.  
  
"I'm chipped." He corrected, "Government experiment."  
  
Faith nodded in some sort of understanding, "Right." She settled her gaze on Dawn, "And you. You got really tall."  
  
Dawn smiled, "Yeah..." She looked down, her thoughts wandering. Faith's false memories were evident, now. It unnerved her still when people remembered her past, and all she could think of was how they weren't real.  
  
"Hey." Faith said suddenly, after a long pause, "Wait..." She narrowed her eyes, "Where's Joyce?"  
  
A different silence settled. Thick with tension and memories. Buffy cleared her throat, "Mom died, last year. She had had a brain tumor, and there were complications."  
  
Faith's eyebrows knitted together, "What? But she was...so healthy and--"  
  
"It was an accident." Buffy said, "I'm sorry, we had no way of telling you or anything-"  
  
"Jesus, B. don't apologize." Faith laughed humorlessly; "As if I expected you to keep in touch after the shit I pulled." She glanced at Dawn, and remembered her language, "Sorry."  
  
Dawn blinked, "S'OK."  
  
There was another long pause, and Faith spoke up again, "So...what else has happened?"  
  
Three sets of eyes met, then looked at the brunette. Dawn shook her head, "How much time do you have?"

**2003  
Los Angeles**

Wesley looked up and smiled at the figure in the doorway, "Spying on me?"  
  
Faith returned the smile and came into the room, out of the shadows of the hallway, "Why spy when I can just ogle shamelessly?"  
  
He shook his head with a chuckle, and held out his arms. Faith leaned into his embrace without hesitation, resting her cheek against the smoothness of his chest, "I was worried about you guys. I should have come with you."  
  
"We held our own. It was just three V'Rosz demons. We didn't get too beaten up."  
  
Faith shook her head and traced a fresh cut on his left shoulder with her fingertip, "You should bandage that."  
  
"It's just a scrape." He protested. Faith smiled at his stubbornness and leaned up to kiss him lightly on the lips.  
  
"I'm exhausted." She murmured against his mouth, "Come to bed?"  
  
Wesley kissed her once more, "In a minute. I need to make a quick note about those demons and I'll be right back."  
  
Faith rolled her eyes, "Always the watcher."   
  
He winked at her before disappearing out into the dark hallway.


	9. Remembrance

**2002**

**Sunnydale**

"Who wants desert?"

Three me's answered and Buffy nodded, going off to the kitchen.

"Did she make it herself?" Dawn asked nervously.

Spike smirked and shook his head, "No, store-bought."

"Oh, thank God." Dawn sighed, "I love her to death, but she honestly can't cook."

Faith, meanwhile was studying Spike intently, her eyebrows drawn together. Then, it dawned on her, "You!!"

Spike raised a scarred eyebrow, "Yeah. Me. So?"

"At the Bronze. When I switched bodies with B., I saw you at the Bronze."

"Wait a minute." Spike crossed his arms, "You. You're the one who--"

"Yup. Warm champagne. Remember now?"

Dawn looked from the Slayer to the vampire, both eyebrows raised, "Um, did I miss something?"

Just then, Buffy came in, carrying a tray of brownies, "What're we talking about?"

"Champagne, I think." Dawn replied.

"Huh?"

Spike nodded towards Faith, "She hit on me, once."

Faith snorted, "Please. I was messing with your head. I knew you wanted Buffy, just by the way you were talking to me. It was fun to see the look on your face."

Buffy set down the brownies and placed her hands on her hips, "Someone PLEASE tell me what the HELL your talking about."

"Nothing." Faith said, shaking her head. She looked at Buffy for a moment, "Have you gained weight or something?"

****

****

**2003**

Willow found Buffy in the living room, watching Sesame Street with Cassandra on her lap. She stood still for a moment and watched them before clearing her throat.

"Oh, hey Will." Buffy said, looking over her shoulder, "Sleep well?"

"Yeah. Any word from Spike?" Willow replied, heading over to pour herself a cup of coffee.

"No. I'm really worried. He seemed so freaked out when I left."

"But he told you he would be safe, right?"

"Right. I believe him, too, but I still can't help but think that maybe he's bending the truth. He has a tendency to do that."

Willow smiled, "More than a tendency."

"A compulsive habit?"

Cassandra giggled in Buffy's lap and she looked down, "Do you agree, Miss Cassandra?"

The baby clapped her hands in reply and Buffy laughed, "For her sake, I hope this time he's telling me the absolute truth. Because without him...we're lost."

****

****

**2002**

Faith was still blinking owlishly as Buffy and Dawn cleared the table. Spike had left to patrol as soon as dinner had ended, leaving the three women to "do whatever it is they do".

"You're..."

"Pregnant." Buffy finished for her, "Are you over the shock yet?"

"No." Faith shook her head, "This is too wild for words. I mean, first of all, a vampire's kid? That's like, unheard of. Second of all, it's you."

"Yeah, I know it's me. So what?"

"So, I don't know. It's weird."

Dawn rolled her eyes, "Get over it, and come fill us in about LA."

Faith followed them to the living room, "Hold on a sec, I wanna know more about what's going on here in Sunny-D. I missed a lot."

"Buffy and Spike are getting married in a month." Dawn said excitedly.

Faith stared at Buffy, "You do realize that you have basically taken the Slayer Handbook, stomped on it, spit on it, and pissed on it."

"Yup. Ain't it great?"

"Go, B." Faith grinned, "What else?"

"Um...Willow's gay." Buffy said, "And Xander's married, Giles lives in London now, but he's here for the wedding...that's it, I think."

Faith shook her head incredulously, "This place has just turned upside down while I was stuck in that cell."

"I died again." Buffy whispered, "Did they tell you I died?"

Faith nodded, "Yeah. And the told me you were alive. That was it. Angel came to see me the first time, the second time I just got an anonymous letter saying you were fine."

Dawn cleared her throat, "Xander sent it."

"Why?"

"I don't know. He said he thought you should know and he doubted Angel would remember to, since he'd be too busy being happy then brooding because he was happy."

Buffy looked at her sister, "Why didn't he tell me?"

"I don't know."

Faith had fallen quiet, remembering what she had put Xander through. Hell, she'd tried to strangle him. "I should go see him, soon."

Dawn and Buffy turned to look at her.

"I'll call everyone tomorrow. They'll probably all come over. But Xander's on his honeymoon. So, it'll be a few days before you can talk to him. Why do you need to, anyway?"

"I have to apologize for some stuff." Faith replied with a shrug, "I owe him...Did you ever call Angel to tell him I was here?"

"No," Buffy replied, "But I will if you want me to."

"OK. I would, but I'm almost afraid to."

"Why would you be? I was under the impression that Angel was helping you."

"He was. But the others, especially Wes, I don't know how they'll react." Faith looked down, "I did a lot of screwed up shit to them, B. It's hard to forgive that."

Author's Note-- I know everyone is all mad because I spell Tarah the way I do. But that's just how I spell it, and if I tried to do it Tara, then half the story will have Tarah and half will have Tara, cuz it's habit just to add the h. I've seen other people spell it this way. What's the big deal? But if it bugs you that much, please let me know.


	10. Unleashing the Curse

**2003**

Spike was ready. He had cleaned the basement from floor to ceiling, left to right, and now there was nothing to keep him from opening that box. No more excuses. it was time to just...get it over with.

"So, Dru..." He whispered, slowly lifting the lid of the velvet box, "What have you got for me this time?"

Inside the box was a tiny scrap of parchment paper, brown around the edges, crackled and aged to a thinness that made it feel like the paper would turn to dust in his hands. He turned it over and found emerald ink that looked as if it had been written mere hours ago. He closed his eyes a moment and said a silent prayer? Wish? He wasn't sure. But when he opened his eyes, he didn't feel any safer.

**Fæddur til nótt  af dimma taka þú fangi. This refsing á þú a veita. **

Spike read the words in a soft whisper. He waited for a few seconds before white-hot pain shot through his chest.

**2002**

**Los Angeles**

"I just got an interesting phone call."

Cordelia looked up from the bassinette, tearing her attention away from Connor, "About a case? One that pays money?"

"No," Angel said, "Sorry. Actually, Faith's in Sunnydale. It was Buffy on the phone."

Cordelia dropped the stuffed lamb she'd been holding, "Faith's out of jail?"

"She's out on parole." Angel clarified, "It's safe."

The former May Queen stood angrily, "Safe? Angel, she is NOT a safe kind of gal. This is FAITH we're talking about."

"People change, Cordy." He said, a little irritated.

"In only two years?"

Angel sighed, "Anyway, Buffy's invited us to Sunnydale. She says something important is going on."

"In Sunnydale?" Wesley asked, coming in from his office.

"Yeah." Cordelia answered, "Faith's there. I doubt Buffy'll be alive by the end of the week."

"That's enough, Cordelia." Angel snapped, "Faith wanted to change and I feel that she had true intentions of getting help."

"From what? Serial Killers Anonymous? I'm sorry, Angel, but I'm not so trusting of her."

"We should go to Sunnydale." Wesley interupted, "If Buffy says there is something of importance happening."

The vampire and the seer looked at him.

"You want to see Faith?" Cordelia asked incredulously.

"Actually...I'd rather spend a month without water in the Sahara..."

"You don't have to go, Wes." Angel told him, "If it makes you uncomfortable."

"I'll go." He said, "But don't expect me to trust Faith. Ever."

**2002**

**Sunnydale**

Faith was asleep on the couch when Spike got home. It was after 3 am, and he wasn't surprised to find the house silent and dark. He tossed a blanket over the brunette Slayer before heading upstairs. He found Dawn's room quiet, then went quietly to the room he shared with Buffy.

"You're home." She whispered, and he smiled.

"Yeah. What're you doing awake?"

She yawned and lifted the covers, gesturing for him to join her, "Waiting for you. Faith took the news about the baby well."

Spike undressed and slid into bed next to her. "Did she?"

"Yeah. She's still in shock, I think."

"Hmm." He murmured, burying his nose in her hair and inhaling the scent of her shampoo. If someone had told him three years ago that he would eventually be engaged to the Slayer and curling up with her in bed, he's have laughed in their face. For over two years, it had been all he thought about, and now he had it in his grasp.

"Hey, Spike?"

"What is it, luv?"

"Angel's coming to Sunnydale at the end of the week."

Spike's eyes flew open, "WHAT?"

**2003**

**Sunnydale**

_"Yes, but are they about me?"_

_Spike looked around the room. He knew this place. It was so far away, though. So far in his memories that the images were blurred around him. **No...I'm not here. This isn't real**. He looked to the small couch where a former version of himself sat beside a dark-haired beauty._

_"Every syllable." William breathed._

_"Oh, God!"_

_What was I thinking? She was...vapid, useless. She was nothing compared ot Buffy. _

_"Oh, I know... it's sudden and... please, if they're no good, they're only words but... the feeling behind them... I love you, Cecily."_

_"Please stop!"_

_"I know I'm a bad poet but I'm a good man and all I ask is that... that you try to see me--"_

_"I do see you. That's the problem. You're nothing to me, William. You're beneath me."_

****

**_Why has Drusilla sent me here? WHAT'S THE FRIGGIN POINT, DRUSILLA?_**_ Spike screamed, but the aristocrats in the house didn't hear him. It was as if he wasn't even there._

Spike writhed on the basement floor, gasping for air. Another shot of pain zapped through him as more memories flashed behind his eyes.

_"Oh, I see you. A man surrounded by fools who cannot see his strength, his vision, his glory...That and burning baby fish swimming all around your head."_

_..._

_She started up the stairs, and Spike watched her as she climbed them slowly, as if she knew this was the last time she'd ever climb that staircase._

_"I know you'll never love me." He blurted, suddenly. _

_Buffy paused halfway up the stairs, and turned back to look at Spike. _

_"I know that I'm a monster." He said sincerely, "But you treat me like a man. And that's..." _

_Buffy gazed at him, her eyes full of emotion he couldn't even read. Spike cleared his throat and shifted his weight._

_"Get your stuff. I'll be here."_

Memories. The most painful, heart-wrenching, terrible memories of Spike's long life and un-life. It was Dru's payback. Her punishment for Spike's betrayal to her and the vampire race by loving a Slayer.

Just before Spike passed out from the first round of memories and electrical shots of pain, he lifted his head from the concrete floor and whispered a name into the empty air.

"Buffy..."

Author's Noteà Rough translation of the curse: 

Children born of darkness call to you from my hands. This punishment I bestow upon you. So it shall be.


	11. Intentions Unknown

**2002**

**Sunnydale**

"What's his trauma?" Faith asked over her glass of orange juice, and tilting her chin in Spike's direction. It was morning and she had been surprised to find herself in Buffy's house. Sometimes she still expected to wake up in a cell on a hard cot. But this morning she'd opened her eyes to sunshine and a soft chenille blanket.

"Angel's coming." Dawn replied. "Buffy told him last night and he's been grumpy all morning."

"Where is B, anyway?"

Dawn shrugged, "She said she had to make a grocery run, then stop off to see Willow at her parents'."

"They're all coming today, aren't they?" Faith asked softly, staring into her juice.

"Yeah, I think so." Dawn replied sympathetically, "But don't worry, Faith. I can tell you're different now. They will, too."

"I guess. I mean, maybe Willow will."

"Willow's very understanding." Dawn agreed supportively.

"But Xander's another story."

"Why?"

Faith smiled sadly at the teenager, "You're too young to know."

Dawn rolled her eyes, "Fine. I have to go to Janice's to work on a project for History. Tell Buffy I'll be home by three."

Faith nodded and finished her juice as Dawn bounded out of the kitchen. Moments later, the back door opened and Buffy came in carrying two full grocery bags. She waved at Faith with her free hand and took the bags to the table setting it down. Faith leaned against the counter and watched as Buffy started to unload enough food to feed an army. She had to admit, the blond slayer looked really good. She had gained weight (duh, pregnant) and she looked less anorexic than the last time Faith had been in Sunnydale. And she seemed almost content.

"What are you staring at?" Buffy asked casually without turning around to face Faith.

"You're doing pretty good, huh?"

"Yeah." Buffy said with a half-smile, "Things are...better. I keep thinking that, you know, it's too good to last for too long."

"I know the feeling." Faith agreed, "So. Spike's in a peachy mood."

Buffy snorted and shook her head, "He says he's leaving the state until Angel goes back to LA."

"What's up with that? I thought Angel was his sire or something."

"He is. But, they never really got along, I guess. I don't know the details why."

"Hm."

Spike laughed from the living room, "I can hear you both talking, you know. I have excellent *vampire* hearing."

"Well then, why do you have a problem with Angel?" Faith demanded, standing in the doorway.

"He's a bloody idiot." Spike replied, "Good enough reason for you?"

"It'll do. For now." Faith shot back with a shrug.

Just then, there was a knock at the door. Spike raised an eyebrow at Faith, "You mind getting that? Sunlight and all. You know how it is."

Faith rolled her eyes and went to get the door.

"And who the Hell are you?" Hank Summers demanded from the other side.

**2003**

**Los Angeles**

It was past noon when the inhabitants of the Hyperion rose from their beds. After the girls' night out at Carita's and the men's adventure with the slime demon, bedtime had been after 5 am. 

"I need coffee." Dawn groaned, leaning her forehead against the countertop, "The kind not made by Cordelia if at all possible."

"Hey!" Cordelia protested, "I make excellent coffee."

"Just humor her." Angel said jokingly, "Or else she'll just drive you crazy till you give in."

"Shut up, you...you...vampire." 

Angel chuckled, "Hey, I got a call from Giles the other day." He set a mug of coffee in front of Dawn, "He wants to know if any of us are interested in flying over to London for Christmas."

"You don't celebrate Christmas." Faith reminded him.

"I know. Vampires don't, usually. But, Connor deserves a Christmas." Angel smiled at the baby, who was currently half-asleep in Gunn's lap, "Plus, it's an excuse for everyone to see eachother. And Buffy will have an actual excuse not to see her father at Christmas. It'll work out for everyone."

"I'd love to see England again." Wesley chimed in, "It's been too long."

"Yeah. He needs to get his fill of the mother country before he goes through scone withdrawal." Faith deadpanned. Wesley pinched her playfully in the side and she reciprocated with a kiss on the lips, "Watch it, Watcher."

"You guys are so disgustingly cute it makes me want to hurl." Dawn muttered.

**2002**

**Sunnydale**

"I'm Glinda the good witch." Faith retorted, "Who the fuck are you?"

Spike chuckled, "Oh, I like her."

Buffy poked her head out of the kitchen, "What's going on?...Dad?"

Hank pushed past Faith and into the living room, "Buffy."

"Dad, what're you doing here?" She crossed her arms self-consciously, hiding the slight bulge in her abdomen.

"I requested some information from my accountant on the financial situation youa nd your sister are in. Little did I know that your debts would be so high."

"You came to talk about my bills?"

"No. I came to make sure Dawn is being taken care of properly." Hank said, "Do you realize that your money situation has taken a nosedive in the past two years?"

"I--"

"How could you allow things to get so out of control?" Hank demanded, "I thought oyu had more responsibility."

Faith and Spike looked on silently as Hank tore into his daughter, mindless that there were other people in the room. Faith wondered if it would be considered wrong of her to break both his legs. Spike was just still and silent. He waited for the man wo stood yelling at his fiancee to say something that could constitute the breaking of his neck, and crossed his arms.

"Dad, things have just been tough lately. I was trying to get the bills paid." Buffy said desperately, "Why don't you sit down, I'll get you something to drink and we can talk about a solution--"

"I want Dawn to come live with me."

"Wha...What?" Buffy sank down into the armchair by the door, "Why?"

"You obviously can't take care of her." Hank continued, "And by the looks of it the company you keep can't be a good influence."

Faith's jaw dropped, then snapped back up. Well...he was kind of right. But how dare he!

"Dad, please. Can't we just talk--"

"I am so disappointed in you, Buffy."

Spike had had enough, in a flash he was up and in the man's face, "Enough." He snarled, "You've said enough, now get out."

"Who are you to kick me out of my own daughter's house?"

"I'm her fiancee, and I refuse to sit here and let you treat her like it's her fault that you haven't raised a finger to help her or Dawn in the past tow years."

"You're FIANCEE?" Hank said incredulously, glaring at Buffy from where he stood, "Please tell me this is a joke."

"It's not a joke, Mr. Summers." Spike said, the last two words dripping with acid and sarcasm, "Before you stormed in here, did you even stop to think that the fact that Buffy is completely broke is YOUR FAULT?"

"Excuse me?"

"You didn't even bother to come to your own wife's funeral."

"Ex-wife."

"It doesn't. Matter. Your children needed you and where were you?"

"I was on a business trip to Spain. I was unable to--"

"But you couldn't have called? And what about money? You have plenty of it. You couldn't have sent enough to pay off the bills? What kind of father are you?"

Buffy grabbed Spike's hand, "Spike, that's enough." She whispered, tugging him back gently, "Dad, Dawn is staying here. If you want, you can help us in other ways. But I can't let her leave Sunnydale."

"And why not?"

Buffy was quiet. She couldn't tell her father about the fact that Dawn wouldn't be safe without Buffy to protect her. She was still the key, and she was still in danger. But she could tell him the truth, "I need her to stay. I'd be lost without her here."

"Are you really getting married?" Hank asked after a long pause.

"Yes. In less than a month." Buffy replied.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Would you have cared?"

"Of course."

Faith shifted uncomfortably in the corner, and Buffy could tell that the other Slayer was just dying to say something.

"Faith?"

"Well...it's just...Hello? Did you just jinx the hell out of this while we were in the kitchen a few minutes ago? You are Murphy's Law in action, B."

"Who is she?" Hank demanded again.

"The truth?" Buffy asked.

"Yes, please."

"I'm an ex-convict. I just got released on parole for murdering a man."

Hank glared at Faith, "I don't like being lied to."

"Whatever."

"Dad, can you just...go? We can talk abut this tomorrow. I'm just really tired and I need a day to just think. If it bothers you so much that you don't think I'm taking care of Dawn, you should talk to her. Just...not tonight."

Hank regarded her for a moment, then nodded, "I guess I can wait. I'll be here by noon tomorrow. I intend to discuss this...wedding. I'm staying at the Hilton if you need me."

And after Hank left, Spike let out a growl that made both Faith and Buffy jump, "Bloody bastard. He comes here to yell at YOU for your money problems that are HIS bloody fault while he's staying all comfy at the soddin' Hilton! I should just--"

"Spike!" Buffy cut him off, "Spike, calm down. I can handle my father. But...thanks for, you know. Sticking up for me. It was sweet."

Spike quieted and took a deep breath, "I just didn't like how he was...blaming you."

"I for one, whould have kicked his ass." Faith spoke up, "But um...I'm trying to cut back on the violence."

"Thanks, both of you." Buffy said with a slight giggle, "I'm gonna go finish making dinner before everyone gets here."

As she disappeared into the kitchen, Faith turned to Spike, "What happens when her father finds out about the baby."

Spike shrugged, "Don't know. I reckon it's a good thing I'm already dead, don't you?"

****

****

**_Author's Note—_**_This fic is moving Soooooo slowly, I know. Next chapter will have the rest of the day, with the Scoobies and Giles reacting to Faith, and will have more set in 2003. Then, I hope to move on to the day the Angel Investigations crew arrives by Chapter 13. Then things should scoot along pretty quickly. I apologize for the tediousness._


	12. Please Forgive

**2002**

**Sunnydale**

At the dinner table: The Witches, the Ex-Demon, the Whelp, the neutered Vampire, the Key, the Slayer, the Watcher, and the Murderer.

"So." Faith said with that same air of confidence she had carried with her back in high-school. Everyone else stayed quiet, most of them avoiding eye contact with eachother, mostly staring at their plates. If any one of them had really stopped and looked into the ex-convicts eyes, they would have noticed the slight flicker behind dark irises, the wavering of confidence behind a false bravado. 

Willow was the first to break the silence by clearing her throat softly, "So, Faith...Have you decided what you'll do in Sunnydale?"

Faith smiled a little and mentally thanked Willow, "Not yet, Red. I was thinking of getting my GED and taking classes at UC Sunnydale next semester."

"It's good you want to move on with your education," Giles said in that polite, watcherly way of his, "Have you thought of what direction you want to go in?"

"Not yet." Faith replied, dazzling with a smile, "I just want to be normal, maybe."

"You do know this is a Hellmouth, right?" Anya broke in. Xander nudge her and she was quiet, "Sorry."

"I'm aware." Faith whispered, her eyes locking on the top of Xander's head, which was all she could really see, since he was hunched over his plate of lemon pepper chicken. 

There were several moments of eating in silence before Tarah spoke, "Dawnie. How's school?"

"Almost over!" Dawn replied excitedly, "And once school's out, Faith said she'd teach me how to--"

"How to what?" Xander interrupted, suddenly glaring at Faith, "Tell us, what *were* you going to teach Dawn? What *could* you teach her?"

Faith returned his stare, internally shaking like a lost child. He kept her gaze for a moment before tossing down his napkin and standing.

"I'll be outside." He muttered.

Buffy tried to grab his arm, "Xan--"

"Not now, Buf."

They all watched him go, then several pairs of eyes zeroed in on Faith. She looked down, and then hurriedly stood to follow him.

**2003**

**Sunnydale**

_"They call him William the Bloody because of his bloody awful poetry!"_

_Little pins, pricking my skin, tiny little needles. Like fire. Like Fire. Slayer...Please. Needles in my skin._

_"You walk in worlds the others can't imagine."_

_"Yes..."_

_Buffy...Dru? Please...Flames in my hair. Spiders on my hands. Help. Please..._

Spike tried to stagger to his feet, his eyes hazy with pain and hallucinations, while his head throbbed with memories and visions.

_"Spike...Spike..."_

_Buffy?_

_"Spike, where are you? I can't find--"_

_Screaming. Why was she screaming? BUFFY!_

_"HELP! SPIKE!"_

_No. No! NO!_

_"I can't see...Spike..."_

_Blackness again._

**2002**

**Sunnydale**

Faith slipped out the back door to find Xander sitting on the steps, staring off into the yard. She stood silently, but he sensed her anyway.

"Do you know how long it took me..." He began, "To forget you?"

Faith was silent, her arms hugging her denim jacket closer to her body as she shivered slightly.

"Every time I saw one of those road signs. You know. The ones that say 'Danger, sharp curves ahead'. I would think of you. I'll steer you 'round the curves. Remember?"

"Yes."

"Sometimes, I would wake up at night and I couldn't breath. I would think of you then. And the first time I made love with Anya, I was so...scared. Though maybe she'd shove me out the door not two minutes after. I thought of you then, too."

"I--"

"Shut up." He snapped, "Did you even ever think about me? While you were living it up with your mayor, or sitting in that cell? Did you ever ONCE feel sorry for making my life Hell for close to a year?"

"I thought about a lot." Faith said quietly, in a very out-of-character voice that sounded full of tears and remorse, "Especially you and Wesley. I hurt you both the worse."

"What'd you do to him?" Xander asked taking his eyes away from her.

"Bad things." She replied, sitting next to him on the steps, "I'm sorry."

"Sorry doesn't make it all better."

"I know." She let out a long breath, "I know that, Xander. But I am...for all of it. I was just so fucked up. I still am. But at least now I can take what's going on inside my head and just control it. I wish I could have done that back then."

"What's done is done, Faith." Xander said evenly, "There's no going back."

"I know! I know it better than anyone!" Faith threw up her hands, "What do you want from me?"

"I want you to beg." He said coldly.

"What?"

"That's exactly what I want. But I don't have it in me to make you beg for forgiveness." Xander snorted, "It's called remorse."

Faith sighed deeply, "Will you forgive me? Ever?"

"Someday. Till then, I'm just going to try and...tolerate you."

Faith flinched at his iciness, but knew she deserved it. Xander stood up and went to the door. 

With a pause he laid his hand on the handle, "I never wanted you to rot in a cell, Faith. I'm glad you're out."

And with that, he left her sitting alone in the warmth of the night.


	13. I Will

**2002**

**Sunnydale**

Angel would be in Sunnydale in 48 hours, which meant Buffy had two days before all Hell broke loose on Revello Drive. In the meantime, she was scheduled for lunch with her father and Dawn to 'discuss' money problems and other arrangements. Faith was uncharacteristically quiet, Spike stomped around smoking like a chimney most of the time, and Dawn watched it all with wide-eyed amusement. And the Slayer was trying to keep them all from falling completely apart. 

"I'll be back by three." Buffy was telling Faith, "Spike's at the crypt collecting some of his stuff he left behind, so he won't be back until sundown...Will you be OK?"

Faith grinned, "I think I can handle being home alone for a few hours, B."

"I know." Buffy said, relaxing a bit "I'm just on freak-out auto-mode."

"Relax, go to lunch, don't worry about me."

The blond smiled and waved over her shoulder before shutting the front door behind her, leaving Faith to the empty house, alone. She fidgeted with the remote for a few minutes, flipping by daytime talk shows and soap operas, before completely abandoning the thought of watching TV. The nervous energy was coiled deep into the pit of her stomach, waiting for some kind of release. *Too bad I can't go on patrol during the day* she thought, swinging her arms at her sides. The combined nervousness over Angel and the gang's arrival, the dinner the night before, and Xander's oh-so-clear hatred of her was enough to drive the Slayer up the wall with jitters. When the doorbell rang she practically sprung off the couch and sprinted at the door, swinging it open as if Tom Cruise were waiting on the other side.

"Oh. It's...Where's Buffy?"

Faith stepped back a little, staring at Xander from inside the house, "Lunch with her dad."

"Oh. I'll come back later, then."

"Xander."

He turned, one foot on the first step, "Yeah?"

"Can we talk? Without the yelling or me-bashing?" Was that a smile in his eyes? Maybe.

"Talk about what?"

"Update me on Sunnydale. Teach me how to make the perfect banana split. I don't care. Just don't leave me alone in this house."

Xander considered her for a moment before shrugging and coming inside, although he did send her a wary glance as she shut the door.

"Don't worry. I won't bite." She joked, her hands shoved deep in her pockets.

There was a long, awkward silence and zero eye contact.

"Can we sit?" Faith broke the silence, "This foot shuffling is exhausting."

"Fine."

Sitting, then more awkward silence. Faith let out an exasperated sigh and crossed her arms, "Look, you don't have to stay. I could deal with an empty house."

Xander's eyes softened when he caught the slight waver in her voice, "I'll stay. You don't want to be alone, I can get that."

Faith sighed in relief (sort of) and leaned forward, "It's just, with Angel and Cordelia, and Wesley--God, especially him--I'm freaking out more than usual."

"Faith, what did you *do*?"

"You really want to know? I mean, can you handle that without wanting to kill me? Or yell at me again? Because to be really honest, Xan, I can't handle being bashed today."

"Tell me. I won't freak."

She gathered up her courage, her hands shaking a little, so she sat on them, "When I was in LA, I tortured Wesley. For hours and hours, I beat him and cut him and did unspeakable things. I treated him ten times worse than I treated you." She met Xander's dark gaze and forced a smile, although tears were starting to slowly fall from reluctant eyes, "The worse part is, he was supposed to be my Watcher. We were supposed to have a bond. Every Slayer loves her Watcher in one way or another. Buffy loves Giles unconditionally and I loved my first watcher until Kakistos..."

Xander took Faith's hand and squeezed as she continued, "I should've given Wesley that much. I should've loved him like I was supposed to. Instead I hurt him. I could have KILLED my own Watcher. I can't even imagine how he must feel knowing his Slayer ditched him."

Faith hurriedly wiped away her tears and sniffed, "Sorry. I'm just really up and down and emotional lately."

"That's OK." Xander murmured, "Sorry I was so harsh last night. I didn't realize how hard you were on yourself."

"I deserved it. Thanks for listening just now."

"No problem." He shrugged and shot her that goofy Zeppo grin, "I'm used to hormonal Slayers."

Faith laughed for the first time since...Ever.

**2003**

**Los Angeles**

_She's so beautiful in the sunlight_, Wesley thought as he watched Faith play with Connor in the mid-afternoon light. The garden of the Hyperion was blooming and she had tucked a tropical red flower behind her ear, another behind Connor's, making the baby giggle. Faith looked over and smiled and Wesley as she scooped Connor up and held him above her head, the baby screaming and giggling wildly.

"You're so good with him." Wesley murmured into her neck as Faith let the baby gently down into her arms.

"I never thought I'd be playing with Angel's son." She commented, making faces at the infant in her arms, "Then again, I never imagined any of this."

Wesley's eyebrows furrowed, "But...you're happy here, aren't you?"

Faith faced him, smiling widely. He was adorable when he was insecure, "Of course. I wouldn't trade this for the world." She reached up and traced his cheek with her finger, "God, Wes, for the first time ever, I love my life."

"Good." He said, reaching into his pocket, "That makes this a lot easier."

"What are you--" Her eyes focused on the diamond ring in his palm. The California sun reflected off the sparkling surface and she gasped, "Wesley."

"Faith, I love you. And I want to be with you forever if you'll"

Her lips pressed urgently against his as she struggled to hold the baby *and* hug Wesley as hard as she could. "Oh I will." She breathed as they pulled apart, "I will."


	14. They're he-ere

**2002**

**Sunnydale**

Buffy stepped out into the dim twilight, pausing on the back porch to watch as Spike paced under the tree, stopping to take drags from the cigarette between his fingers every so often. She sighed, worried about his antsy-ness the past few days. He was stressed over everything from Angel to Buffy's father. 

"Spike?" She said his name softly as she approached him slowly, "You OK?"

"Yeah, yeah. Just um...restless, I guess." He muttered, stomping out the cigarette.

"It's only a few days, you know." Buffy assured him, "Angel is only coming to see Faith."

"I know that."

"Spike, please. When he comes, don't start--"

"I *won't*" He growled, digging in his pocket for his Marlboros.

"Would you grow up?!" Buffy demanded, snatching the pack of cigarettes out of his hand, "Jesus, Spike, you can't handle three days with Angel around?"

"I can handle it." He muttered, "I just hate the stupid--"

"Why?" She interrupted, "What makes you hate him? I thought vampires were supposed to be connected to their sires."

"Right." Spike snorted, "Angelus was an arsehole of a sire. Then when the bloody git lost his soul, he came back and gave me another round. He always has what I want to most." He leaned against the tree, his eyes becoming sad, "He always, *always* had Dru, no matter what. He had you. He still has you."

"No."

"Don't deny it, Buffy." He said sadly, "A nice big part of you still belongs to my sire."

Buffy sighed and took Spike's hands in hers, pulling him reluctantly away from the tree, "Spike, I don't love Angel like I used to. I still feel for him, and I always will. Angel and I had a connection that will be there forever."

"Great. Just aim below the belt, why don't you."

"Let me finish." She took his left hand and placed it over her abdomen, "I love you, Spike. I don't say it enough, and should've told you sooner than I did, but I do. It's your baby I'm carrying and Angel being here won't change that."

Spike sighed and dropped a kiss on her forehead, "Cor, Slayer, you're..."

"Beautiful, strong, smart, perfect?" She finished, "Yes. I know."

"And so modest, too." Spike chuckled, holding her closer, "Alright, then. I'll be civil to the poofter."

"Good."

**2003**

**Sunnydale**

Willow sighed, her foot tapping rapidly on the kitchen floor. Buffy paced, and Tarah gently rocked the baby as she watched the Slayer walk a trench through the living room floor.

"He should've called by now." Buffy muttered, "It's been almost two days...Something is really wrong."

"Buffy, I'm sure he's--"

Buffy whirled around to face Willow, "No! Will, he isn't fine. I just...I just know that something has happened." Tears started to trickle down her cheeks, "God, what is he's...I mean, I don't know what I'd do if something happened to him."

Willow stood and rushed to her friend, pulling Buffy into her arms, "Oh, Buffy, it's OK."

"We're nothing without him, Will. He's my life."

"We know." Tarah whispered, standing to place a hand on Buffy's shoulder. The blond turned and forced a smile, gently taking Cassandra from Tarah.

"Thanks, you guys. But I won't stop wigging until he calls and I know for sure he's OK."

**2002**

**Sunnydale**

By Friday, also known as The Arrival of Angel Day, tension was so high in the house, Faith was sure you could reach out and touch it. She watched as Buffy did her best to keep calm, and Spike had pretended to be watching Passions (which he taped during the day while he slept) while constantly standing to look out the window every few seconds. Dawn, however, was bouncing off the walls with sugar-induced hyper-ness. Faith gave the kid five more minutes before Spike grabbed her and restrained her to the chair. *Oh yes, we're all just one big happy family, we are*

"They're here." Dawn said suddenly from the window. Faith glanced at the clock and noted that it was 9:10 pm. Right, so by 9:45, Spike and Angel would be killing eachother and Wesley will have declared his hatred of her. Yay, they're here.

Buffy sent a nervous glance at Spike, whose eyes had remained glued to Passions, then to Faith, "Here goes nothing, huh?"

Faith shot the other Slayer a smile and a wink and answered the door.


	15. If You Hurt Her

**2002**

**Sunnydale**

Yet another interesting gathering at Buffy's house. This time, the Souled Vampire, the Seer, the Genius, the Street Fighter, the ex-Watcher, the Slayers, the Chipped Vampire, and the Key. Oh yes, and the vampire's son. Not to mention that one Slayer was pregnant (by the way, the father's a vampire). Buffy whimpered inwardly. This was all too strange, to anyone who wasn't *her*, that is.

"Come in, everyone." Buffy said, recognizing the two newcomers as Gunn and Fred, who Angel had told her about over the phone. The baby, although she had been filled in, fascinated the blond Slayer. She looked from Angel to the tiny bundle in his arms with wide eyes.

Cordelia shot everyone as wide smile, "Hi everyone."

Dawn immediately grabbed Cordelia's arm, "Oh my gosh, Cordy, you have to see these jeans I bought yesterday. I've been dying to show them to you..."

The seer was dragged up the stairs to Dawn's room. Buffy shrugged, "Dawn always did like Cordelia for some reason...So, sit down you guys, make yourselves comfortable."

After a few moments, everyone who didn't know eachother was introducing themselves, save for Spike, who was scowling blankly into space. Buffy offered Angel a tiny smile, "Hi."

"Hi." He returned the smile, "You look good."

"So do you." She replied, looking down at Connor's sleeping face, "He's beautiful."

"I know." Angel murmured, gazing with adoration at his son. Buffy smiled and took him by the elbow, pulling him into the living room with everyone else, just as Dawn and Cordelia came back downstairs.

Faith shifted uncomfortably as things quieted down and eyes started turning to her. "Um..." She shuffled a bit and scanned Cordelia's and Angel's faces. They both looked...accepting, she guessed. But Wesley refused to look up and meet her eyes. *What did you expect?* she thought, *A warm welcome? Yeah right*.

"So, what's new in Sunnydale?" Cordelia asked loudly, pulling some of the attention away from Faith, and for the first time she found herself *liking* the former May-Queen.

"A lot, actually." Buffy said, "You know about Xander getting married, and all. But Giles just got in from England, and he's staying for a while."

"Really?" Angel looked up, "Why?"

Buffy glanced over at Spike, "Well, there's a few things you guys should know." She forced a smile, trying to make herself tell Angel what she had been too chicken to do over the phone, "Spike and I are together."

Shocked silence. Buffy paused and continued, "There was an incident about two months ago with an Arg Iav demon and I got pregnant. We're getting married in three weeks."

"Wow, congratulations." Fred said sweetly, and Buffy smiled gratefully.

"Huh. That's...different." Cordelia commented, glancing over at Angel, who had yet to react to the news.

He didn't. Instead, Angel turned to Faith, "How are you?"

"I'm OK. Little shaky, still. But Buffy has helped a lot." She glanced at the blond Slayer, "Actually...I'm gonna go patrol."

"I'll go with you." Buffy volunteered, but Faith shook her head.

"Now freakin' way." She protested, "You could get hurt."

"I'm pregnant, not unable."

Spike put a hand on her arm, "Stay?"

Buffy searched his eyes and found a tiny flicker of insecurity. She realized quickly that he didn't want to be alone with Angel there, "OK. I'll stick around."

Faith shrugged and grabbed her jacket before hurrying out.

2**003**

**Sunnydale**

Spike let out a long shuddering breath as another vision faded away and his body stilled on the floor. He was covered in a fine sheen of sweat, and bruised from head to toe. He struggled to stand, but his joints and muscles were so weak he could hardly lift his head.

"Almost over." He groaned, "I hope."

In the past five hours, Spike had been plagued with flash-backs of his past. Killings he had once been proud of, his life before becoming a vampire, and everything that had happened in Brazil had repeated like fuzzy movies, not to mention the hallucinations and physical pain. If it had been Drusilla who had sent the curse, which he was certain it was, she had meant for him to feel pain.

"Good show, Dru." Spike managed to murmur, before he was hit with another jolt of pain and a vision seared behind his eyelids.

**{Munich, Germany--1898}**

_"So. Grandsire's got 'imself a soul." Spike shrugged, "And?"_

_Drusilla practically swooned in Dalton's arms, "My poor...poor Angelus."_

_Dalton cleared his throat nervously and looked over at Spike, "Uh, I found out very little about the situation...Angelus was cursed by Romanis, that's all I know." *Please don't hurt me* he added under his breath. Spike smirked and cracked his knuckles._

_"Yeah. Thanks for the news." He pulled at Dru's arm, yanking her away from Dalton. Her eyes turned on Spike and she looked at him through tears._

_"My Angelus is gone." She whispered, then dissolved in a heap on the floor. Spike sighed and picked her up._

_"It's alright, Princess." He murmured, "He'll...be fine."_

_The final words came out through clenched teeth and Drusilla ripped away from him, "You don't even CARE!" She snapped, "My Angel is gone forever and it doesn't matter! Ohhhh, the moon will be VERY angry with you, William. Angry indeed."_

_Spike watched as she stomped up the stairs of the house they'd recently moved into. He turned to Dalton and narrowed his eyes "Thanks again, mate." _

_"So, uh...She was real attached to Angelus?"_

_"Like bloody *glue*." Spike growled, kicking at the table and overturning it with a resounding crash. Dalton jumped back._

_"I-I-I should go..."_

Spike took no notice and sunk into a nearby chair, one hand dragging through his sandy brown hair. And that was the first time he realized that Drusilla would *always* choose Angel over him. A chair flew across the room and shattered against the wall as the scene faded away.

**2002**

**Sunnydale**

The group started to disperse after Faith left. Dawn went to the kitchen to grab food for everyone, and Spike wandered off in search of more cigarettes. 

"Hey," Buffy tugged on Angel's arm, "Can we go talk somewhere?"

A mute nod was all she got. Cordelia took the baby and sent Angel a pointed look before he and the Slayer disappeared out onto the front porch.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you when I called." Buffy said immediately, "I didn't feel right saying it over the phone."

Angel sighed, "I didn't tell you about Connor, so we're almost even."

"Are you OK with me and Spike, though?" She asked softly, "I mean, does it bug you?"

"Yes." He replied honestly, "But I'm not going to stop you from being happy. If my idiot of a childe--"

"Hey!"

"Sorry...If Spike makes you happy, then...I won't ruin that." He smiled at her, then glanced over to the side of the house, where Spike was coming around, cigarette held up to his lips, "Speak of the devil."

Spike glanced up and rolled his eyes when he noticed his sire, "Has he convinced you to ditch me yet?"

"No." Buffy replied, shaking her head at him, then glanced to Angel, "I'm gonna go in. You two talk. Be *civil* both of you."

After the Slayer disappeared inside Spike glared at Angel, "I hate you."

"Good."

"If you mess this up for me I swear, I will rip every strand of your poufy hair out and feed it to you." 

"You do that." Angel said. Then in a low voice, he added very succinctly, "If you hurt her I will make damn sure you suffer."

"If I hurt her, you won't have to."

"And why is that?"

"Because I'll stake myself first."


	16. The Whole Sordid Story

**2002**

**Sunnydale**

Faith grunted as she pounced on the vampire, sending the fledgling tumbling backwards, and they both went down. She thrust her stake into the vamp's heart, then hit the ground as the body beneath hers turned to dust. "Oomph." She groaned as she stood, dusting the ashes from her jeans.

"Nice work."

Faith whirled around, stake raised, "Wesley?"

She lowered her arm and watched as her former watcher crossed his arms over his chest and stared at her, "What are you doing here?"

"I didn't want to get in the way at the house." He replied, "Angel and Buffy have explaining to do, Cordelia was talking with Dawn. I was just sitting. I decided to do some patrolling of my own."

"Oh. You patrol now?"

Wesley nodded, and a tense silence fell between them. A small corner of Faith's mind wondered if the world would crumble if she spoke. But the bigger part of her that told the frightened little girl inside to shut up pushed that thought away. Wesley cleared his throat, "So, I assume you're trying to get back into the Slaying groove?"

"Yeah, I guess." Faith replied, shrugging ass he sank down to sit on a headstone, "Gotta start somewhere, though, and slaying is not that place."

"So, where are you starting?"

"Redemption." She whispered, locking eyes with him. He had changed. His face was more rugged, tired. Not old. Not young anymore, though. He wasn't Wesley the Watcher anymore; nerdy, pompous, fumbling. He was different than that naive man.

"Redemption?"

"I need forgiveness, Wesley. I'm working on the people I hurt in Sunnydale, and I think I'm working my way to earning their trust."

"Not that you deserve it."

Faith flinched, but nodded, "I know I don't. Especially not the ones I hurt the most. Like you."

"I'm fine. You didn't hurt me as much as you give yourself credit for." Wesley said coldly, turning to walk away.

"I left scars." She called, "I know, because I have them. On my hands from the glass I used to cut you. I know that you probably hate me."

"I don't hate anyone."

"You're a terrible liar, Wes."

The watcher turned and glared at her, "It's not so much the hate, Faith. It's the _WHY_? Why did you do it? What happened to make you the way you are."

"Were. The way I _was_, Wes. And you don't want to know."

"I do."

She laughed bitterly, "Wesley, my problems started long before Sunnydale, and I was never into crying on someone else's shoulders, so forget it."

"I want to know, Faith. I deserve to know."

Faith launched off the headstone and had Wesley pressed against the side of a mausoleum in a fraction of a second, her nose mere centimeters from his, "You really want to know? The whole long, pathetic, sordid story? About how Faith became so bad?" She released him, "Fine."

"I had a nice life when I was little." She began, "Mom, Dad, nice house, lots of love. I guess. My parents didn't get along. Dad left when I was nine. After that, my mother was just lost, I guess. She started drinking, lost her job, we moved to this little apartment in Boston. Mama was in so much pain, all the time. She was on every drug you can list, and she got it however she needed to. Eventually, she would bring these men to the house. I could hear them in her bedroom...I was ten the first time one of her clients left her passed out in the bed and wandered into my room."

Faith looked away from him, hiding tear-streaked cheeks, "After that night, I started hiding on the fire escape whenever she brought a john to the apartment. Then, I left when i was fifteen. Lived above a diner where I worked for hardly any money. I got my meals the same way my mother got her drugs, I suppose. I learned at an early age. A man will buy you something to tide you over till the next day, for such a little price. Twenty minutes behind the diner, and that was it. And I did it again the next day, and the next, and the next. Then, one day, only a few days after I turned seventeen, this lady comes up to me. She buys me a coffee and a cheeseburger, and she tells me she's watcher." She paused, "Imagine that, I think. There are monsters. Ones worse than the ones I get my meals from."

Wesley watched her with veiled eyes as she paced and continued, "So I have this new person, and she watches over me. Makes sure I get three meals a day, she helps me learn what it is to be a Slayer. But I was never good. I couldn't become a normal kid after a few months of free meals. When Kakistos killed her, I hated myself for not being what I should've been...Anyway, I came to Sunnydale, found Buffy. Since my first watcher...I had lost any hope of anyone caring. I was just Faith. Street kid, juvenile delinquent. Worthless."

"Faith--"

"It's not an excuse for anything I did to you, or Buffy, or Xander...any of them. There is no excuse. But I was fucked up then. I still am. I'm just *trying* for normal." She choked on a sob and sat back down, hiding her face in her hands. When two strong arms wrapped around her, she leaned into the embrace and cried.

**2003**

**Sunnydale**

****

Spike's eyes opened slowly. He wasn't sure what time it is, or even what day it was. But it had been hours…or was it minutes…since his last vision had hit. Maybe it was over…Maybe…He hoisted his aching body to his feet and stumbled to the stairs leading upstairs. He sighed in pain as he opened the door, only to be grabbed and yanked up into the kitchen.

"Agh! Bloody Hell—"

"Hello, my William."

Spike blinked up at the slightly blurry face above him, "Dru?"

"Yes! I hope you enjoyed my prezzie to you. Now that you've opened it and played with it, it's time for the next one." She dropped a cold kiss on his forehead, and everything went black.

**2002**

**Sunnydale**

****

"Hey, where are Faith an Wes?"

"Oh, Faith is still patrolling, and I think Wesley went to check everyone into the hotel." Buffy replied at Cordelia's question.

The former cheerleader stretched and yawned, "Speaking of, we should all be going. It's almost midnight and I, for one, am exhausted."

Angel nodded in agreement, "We'll stop by tomorrow evening."

"You don't have to, peaches." Spike said with a syrupy tone, "We won't miss you."

Buffy kicked him and sent him a glare.

"I mean…Alright. See you then." He wrinkled his nose and looked over at Buffy, "Happy?"

"Yes. Very. Thank you." She replied.

Angel rolled his eyes at his childe and the LA gang started to gather up their things and leave. "Tell Faith I'll talk to her soon."

"Will do." Buffy replied as she walked them to the door, "Thanks. For coming, I mean."

"Of course." Angel smiled, "See you tomorrow."

After they had gone, Spike let out a noise of disgust, "*Of Course*" He mimicked, "Pft. I still hate him."

Buffy laughed and walked over to where he sat in the recliner, "You are impossible."

Spike smirked and pulled her down onto his lap, earning a squeal and a laugh. He pulled her head in for a soft kiss, his right hand resting on her belly, "I love you."

"Ditto." She murmured, "Thanks for being nice to Angel."

"Oh the things we do for love." He muttered, looking down at where his hand rested, "As long as we don't have to name our child after the bloody poofter…"

Buffy smacked him playfully and was pulled in for another kiss before being lifted and carried up to their bedroom.


	17. Untitled

**2003**

**Somewhere in Sunnydale**

When Spike came to, he was chained to a cold stone wall. He pulled experimentally on the shackles that were locked around his wrists. The chains, which hung just above his head, allowed only a few inches of movement. His feet were chained the same way by thick chains that were anchored to the floor by cement. *This is bad...* He thought weakly, still fuzzy from the after-effects of the curse.

"Oh, good." Came a voice that was more of a purr, "You're awake."

Spike tried to speak, but found his mouth dry. Drusilla cooed and gave him a sympathetic look, lifting a glass to his lips.

"Drink up, love." She whispered, "I like it better when you can scream."

Spike glared at her, but took a long gulp of the human blood in the glass. He ignored the wave of nausea that went through him at the first taste of real human blood in over two years.

"What do you want..." He stammered, leaning limply against the stone wall.

"I want things back the way they should be." Drusilla pouted, "I want my William back." Her fingers danced along his hairline, "This--chip you call it--is nothing to our power..."

Spike growled, yanking angrily on the chains, "We've been through this before, Dru! Been there, done that, nothing to write home about, remember?"

The dark-haired vampiress snarled, grabbing him by the hair and yanking his face closer to his, "My Angel...he went away a long, long time ago. Mummy is gone forever, my Spike. The child...he gets in they way. You are all I have left. You *will* come back to me."

Spike sighed and let his eyes shut. This was going to be fun...right...

**2002**

**Sunnydale**

Faith pulled away from Wesley, wiping her eyes, "We should get going. It's late."

"Right." He agreed, clearing his throat as Faith started to walk in the direction of the cemetery gates, "I'll see you in the morning, I suppose."

"Yeah...in the morning." She said distractedly, not looking back as she hurried away. 

As she turned out onto Maple Street, Faith mentally shook herself. She had allowed herself to break down, and with Wesley for God's sake. She had set out to make things better with the people she had wronged in the past, not to let them comfort her. The whole point of this thing was to *not* be weak and be forgiven. It was to be strong this time and make things right. Somehow, though, the lines were blurred and now she had no idea *what* she was doing. 

Faith found herself on Revello without realizing she had gotten so far. When she unlocked the door to the house, she found the lower level empty and the house mostly quiet. She shrugged and let herself fall back onto the sofa, sighing deeply.

"In the morning..." She muttered, wondering what that even meant. Would things suddenly be different? Doubtful. But her first watcher had always prattled on about fresh starts. Usually, Faith would just pretend to listen and plan her next patrol in her head. But once in a while, she would catch a bit of what her Watcher told her. On of those things had been that every day starts over, and what happened the day before is yesterday's news. Closing her eyes, Faith tried to remember her first Watcher's face. But all she could see was Wesley, bruised and battered and tied to a chair in an old warehouse. 

Faith sighed and got up, leaving the house again, knowing she wouldn't be sleeping tonight.

**2003**

**Sunnydale**

Buffy glared at Willy, hands on her hips, "You know something."

The snitch sighed, drying another glass, "I've done told you, Slayer, I ain't seen Spike in days."

The Slayer grabbed the glass from him and crushed it in her fist, "You know that means nothing, Willy, now talk. Who's been in here in the past two days? Who's been talking about getting Spike?"

"I need details, Slayer. I need to know what exactly you want to know."

Buffy crossed her arms, "Three days ago Spike got a package in the mail and sent Cassandra and I away. I went back to the house today and found the door broken down and Spike missing. Now tell me what you know."

"Speaking of Cassandra, how is that little nipper she's such a cute--" Willy stopped talking as a well-manicured hand closed around his throat.

"I have no problem with ending your sorry existence, right here, right now." Buffy ground out, "Now, talk."

Willy rubbed his neck as she released him, taking deep, shuddering breaths of air, "Alright, alright...Three vamps stopped in, talking about picking up Spike."

"When did they come in?"

"Couple days ago..."

"And who do they work for?"

Willy shuffled his feet, "Well, I mean, I don't want to be stirrin' up trouble with--"

"You have three seconds before I *kill* you." Buffy growled, leaning over the bar.

"Drusilla! For the love of---They work for Drusilla."

The Slayer's eyes widened and she stepped backwards a pace, "Tell anyone I was here, and I will feed your intestines to Spike...when I get him back."


	18. Call in the Troops

**2002**

**Sunnydale**

Faith had been walking for hours now, re-discovering the streets she had walked so many times years before. It was past three in the morning by now, the streets mostly deserted, with hardly any vampire or demon activity. She could feel that familiar tingle of dissatisfaction after a fight that didn't leave her completely exhausted. A restlessness that seeped into her bones and made her feel wired, like she'd just downed a couple pots of coffee and taken a few bottles of speed. Every nerve ending stood at attention; add to this her tense muscles from worrying over everything the past few days, and Faith was a walking bomb.

She found herself in front of the Bronze, staring up at the new sign with knitted eyebrows. She hadn't been here in ages, not in this body anyway. She remembered her celebratory night with Buffy here, dancing whatever cares she had left away, exhilarated from the hunt and the adrenaline. Mere hours later she would kill a man...

Faith was shaken out of her thoughts when she was suddenly grabbed from behind, a snarl audible at her shoulder. Her senses screamed * VAMPIRE! * and she mentally thanked TPTB for the send-down as she flipped the vamp over her back, slamming him to the ground. A quick once-over revealed a mud-caked shirt. This guy was newly risen. Piece of cake. She had him dusted in a split second, but hadn't been counting on any pals of the fledgling being around until she was once again attacked from behind, and two more vamps appeared in front of her.

"Oh, shit." She managed, knowing she was stuck as the vampire pushed her face-first against the wall of a building, pinning her from head to toe. She struggled, sensing more vamps circling. 

Faith managed to break free, glancing about long enough to count nine vamps, at least, before running like hell.

**2003**

**Sunnydale**

Buffy accepted the glass of water from Willow gratefully, taking a long sip. "It's Drusilla." She said softly, "He...he could be dead..."

"I'm sure he's fine." Xander cut in, "Dru wouldn't hurt her precious Spike...not too much anyway."

Buffy sighed, "I won't be able to take Dru on alone. I did some digging and found out she's been assembling an army of vamps and demons to take me down."

"So we call for back up. Right?" Tarah offered.

"Yeah, call in the LA troops?"

Buffy thought for a moment, "I'll give Angel a call...Faith will definitely want to help."

"Wow...reunion time, huh?" Willow muttered, "Only in Sunnydale..."

**2002**

**Sunnydale**

Faith was far into Sunnydale by the time she allowed herself to stop running, her breath coming in short gasps. Slayer strength only stretched so far, and being attacked by ten vamps *and* running a few miles was her limit at the moment. She took in her surroundings and found herself int he swankier part of Sunnydale, with designer shops, hotels, and the art gallery. She leaned against the wall of a shop she recognized. She had bought her Homecoming dress here. April Fools...

"Not so much has changed, I guess." She muttered absently, pushing off the wall and looking behind her shoulder for any signs of the vampire gang as she went, not seeing the person walking toward her, head bowed.

The two figures collided, two simultaneous yelps of "OUCH!" Interrupting the quiet night. Faith whirled around to face a possible attacker, but stepped back as she realized who it was, "Wesley?"

The Englishman glared at her, rubbing his shoulder, "Walk much?"

Faith made a noise of disbelief, then laughed, "Oh, you're sarcastic now...Wow. That's new."

Wesley smiled sheepishly, letting his un-bruised arm fall to his side, "Yes, well..."

"So, what are you doing out so late?" Faith asked casually, starting to walk and he fell in step beside her.

"Just walking. You?"

"Getting attacked by vampire gangs." She replied with a shrug.

Wesley's eyebrows rose slightly, "Are they still around?"

"I lost them a while back." Faith assured him, "Sunrise is in about two hours, so they probably won't be back. I'll get them tomorrow when I can have some back up. Maybe you could come with?"

He smiled, but it was too dark for her to catch, "Maybe."

After a few beats, Faith cleared her throat, "Um, Wes...About earlier, I didn't really get to say what I wanted to say."

"What's that?"

"I really am sorry." She said slowly, "And I'm not saying it just to get you to forgive me; I'm saying it because it needs to be said. I really hate myself for the things I did. I wanted you to know that if I could take it all back--" Faith trailed off as tears sprung to her eyes, "Dammit, I can't seem to quit with the water works lately."

Wesley stopped and grabbed her hand impulsively, "I know."

Those two syllables were enough for Faith. She tightened her grip on his hand and they stood still on the sidewalk like that for endless moments, looking eye-to-eye. Faith leaned into him as he mirrored the action, until they were mere inches apart. Then, without warning, they were knocked apart as two vamps came barreling out of no where, followed by three more that Faith recognized from the gang from earlier.

"These are the guys." She called to Wesley, who had taken on the first two. She immediately took on the other three, landing a hard kick to the stomach of a lanky vamp in faded jeans and a Green Day T-Shirt. Her fist jerked back and caught an unseen vamp in the jaw, and then she dropped down, sweeping the legs of the third vamp out from under itself. Green Day Guy was struggling to his feet when she sprung up, her stake hitting home. Before Mr. Green Day had even faded she turned, taking out the one she had hit only moments before. The last vamp had struggled to his feet by now, and she easily staked him, just as Wesley finished off the final vampire on his side.

"That was fun." She panted, heading over to him, "You OK?"

"Dislocated my shoulder." He ground out, pain etched across his face.

"I know the feeling." She murmured, "How far away is your hotel?"

"A block that way." Wesley replied, gesturing with the jerk of his chin. Faith nodded.

"Got a mini-bar?"

"Yes, why?"

"You'll need the alcohol to numb the pain."


	19. Normal??

**2002**

**Sunnydale**

Several mini liquor bottles littered the floor of the hotel room. Wesley was lying shirtless on the bed, his bad arm slightly limp at his side. Faith sighed, taking a long pull from one of the bottles. She was used to popping her *own* dislocated shoulder back into place, and it didn't hurt, but she was the Slayer.

"Oh, you poor thing." Faith muttered to herself, glancing at the form on the bed. "You ready?"

"As I'll ever be." Wesley replied, his voice slightly slurred.

Faith tried to gather up her own courage and finished off the tiny bottle in her hand before tossing it aside. "OK...hold your breath."

She straddle his lap after he struggled himself to a sitting positing, then grasped his arm with one hand, steadying his shoulder with the other, "On the count of three. One...Two."

A loud scream as she popped the shoulder back, "Three."

"Bloody HELL!" Wesley howled, almost knocking her off his lap, "You said to the count of THREE!"

"It would've hurt worse if you knew when I was gonna do it." Faith insisted, "I'm sorry..."

"It's all right...Ow." Wesley leaned back, rotating his shoulder gingerly, closing his eyes.

Faith studied his face for a moment, impulsively reaching out to fix a stray bit of hair on his forehead. Wesley's eyes opened to stare at her a moment, before he leaned forward and captured her lips with his.

~*~

It was five in the morning when Buffy woke up, while it was still slightly dark outside, to find  Spike missing. She climbed out of bed, pulling on her robe as she went, then headed downstairs, careful not to make any noise in the silent house.

"Spike?" She whispered, glancing around the dark living room. After receiving no answer, she checked the dining room and kitchen, which were both empty. Then, she noticed the slight spark of a lighter through the window to the back porch, the tiny flame illuminating Spike's pale face as he lit the cigarette between his fingers. Buffy sighed and went outside.

"Do you have a death wish?" She demanded as she stood in front of him, hands on her hips.

"What?" He raised an eyebrow, playing dumb.

"The sun's going to rise ANY MINUTE." She hissed, "Get inside!"

Spike laughed, "I'll be fine, I have about ten minutes till I gotta worry."

"You're crazy." 

"You may be right." He replied, "But I just may be the lunatic you're--"

Buffy sighed in exasperation and sat next to him on the step, "Shut up."

"What're you doing awake, anyway? You were dead to the world a few minutes ago."

"Slayer senses. You were gone." She replied, winking at him. "So...You're in a good mood at the moment, right?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"Cause, that means it would be a good time to tell you..."

Spike watched her face warily, "Tell me what?"

"You get to go for your tux fitting tomorrow."

"Tux?"

"For the wedding."

"Ugh...Slay-er! NO!" He whined.

"Yes."

Spike sighed, "I have to?"

"Yes."

"Fine..."

"You're going with Angel and Xander as soon as the sun sets. OK? OK, bye." Buffy scrambled to her feet before Spike could react and darted into the house.

Spike sat there, dumbfounded, then hopped up, tossing his cigarette to the ground before chasing after her. Buffy squealed as she noticed him catching up, and she sped up, half-stumbling up the stairs as he caught the back of her robe. They were both laughing hysterically by the time he had her pinned, his fingers tickling her sides.

"You're sending me off with the whelp *AND* Angelus?" He demanded, his fingers still working their torture on her sides.

"Yeah, deal with it." She replied, pushing his hands away.

"AHEM!"

The two blondes quieted and looked up at the figure at the top of the stairs.

"Hi Dawnie." Buffy said softly, "Did we wake you up?"

"Yup."

"Sorry." Spike said with little inflection, "We'll be quiet now. We promise."

Dawn smirked, "Yeah...See you two in the morning. When *normal* people wake up."

After Dawn disappeared back into her room, Spike gave Buffy an inquisitive look, "Have we *ever* been normal?"


	20. Reinforcements

**2003**

**Sunnydale**

Spike had been struggling against his chains for hours now, but it was no use. Drusilla had the damn things *cemented* into the wall and floor. He sagged against the wall, deciding to rest and be glad she had finally stopped the torture bit for a little while. For the past few hours, he had been hit, punched, kicked, burned, and other lovely forms of violence, by her minions. All the while, she rambled.

The solid metal door that was the only escape route in the room swung open, and she swept in, black skirts rustling with every movement.

"And how is my little darling?" She cooed, approaching him and grabbing him roughly by his bruised chin, tilting his head up to look at her, "Feeling better?"

Spike remained silent, glaring at her from his chains.

"You, know, this was coming." She whispered, kneeling in front of him, "It was your turn, William. Do you remember, when it was my turn. You came back to me, even after I rejected you, and you tied me up and tortured me for days...Remember?"

"Yeah." He bit out between clenched teeth.

"Didn't work, though, did it, my love?" She sighed and stood, "No, it did not. You were too weak to really get on with it. Pitiful, pitiful. Miss Edith and I laughed for days and days after you left. For Good."

"Then why am I here, Dru? Hm? You reject me, so why am I here?"

"You betrayed me." She growled, her eyes glowing yellow, "This a *Slayer*. I mean, really. Had you given up all hope on me?"

"So...you can toss me aside for a bloody *chaos demon* but I'm not allowed to move on?"

"Right." She giggled, "Nice, isn't it?"

"But--"

"When I came to you before, when you...oh it was quite a sight, promising to kill me, for that Slayer. But you knew you wouldn't do it. Because you're *weak*." She clucked her tongue, "But, I'll take you back, anyway. Because you belong to me. Not that wispy little--"

"Buffy."

"Yes. Buffy."

"No." Spike grinned up at her, then gestured with his chin to the door, "Buffy."

Drusilla turned and was met by one *pissed* Slayer.

****

**2002**

**Sunnydale**

By daylight, Faith was gone. She woke to find herself held tightly in the arms of someone warm, and she could smell alcohol. Sitting up in bed, she could see the mess on the floor. That would explain it.

"Death by mini-bar." She muttered, extracting herself from Wesley's embrace. After dressing quickly, Faith stopped to look at him. The sheets were pulled up to just below his belly button, and she could see faint white lines of scars that had been invisible last night in the dimness of the room. But now, in the morning, reminders of what she had done were clear and etched out on the smoothness of his skin.

And she left. Without a word, or a touch. Not even a quick note. Because, she wasn't used to this. Every thing with her was fast, and easy, and usually ended right after it, well, ended. Faith had made it a rule to *never* stick around after she slept with anyone. It meant commitment, even if it was only for breakfast or morning-after small talk. It was just easier to get out as soon as possible. But this time, she had stayed, and she had woken up next to Wesley.

As she entered to Summer's house she found the rest of the LA gang there, with Spike whining about tuxedo fittings and Buffy looking like she was about to stake him any minute.

"What's going on?" Faith asked, shutting the door behind her.

"She's makin' me go to a bloody fitting with the poof and the whelp." Spike groused.

"The who and the what?"

"Xander and Angel." Willow clarified, "Meanwhile, we're going last-minute dress shopping. Wanna come?"

Faith nodded quickly, knowing that there was *no* chance of running into Wesley at a bridal shop, "Let me change real fast."

****

**2003**

**Sunnydale**

Drusilla's face immediately shifted into its demon form, her eyes narrowed golden slits, "Slayer."

Buffy wiggled her fingers in a childish wave, "Hi, Drusilla. Now, should you unlock him or should I kill you and do it myself?"

The vampiress giggled, "Oh, little Slayer. If I were you, I would run along home, now. Go on, shoo. I have an army of minions around here, just itching for some play time."

Just then, Angel and Wesley appeared, two minions being dragged, unconscious, into the room.

"I called for reinforcements." Buffy informed her with a shrug, "So, unlock him."

Drusilla glanced at Spike and winked at him before launching herself at the Slayer, one hand flying out to scratch her across the cheek.

Buffy touched the bloody scratches as Drusilla backed off slightly, waiting for retaliation, "Oh. You want a chick fight? Fine."

And they were off. Spike sat in his chains and grinned. This was just *fun*.


	21. Fight

**2002**

**Sunnydale**

Exactly one week before the wedding, Hank Summers decided to pay his daughters another visit. Buffy had been on the phone with the Justice of the Peace while Spike slept in the bedroom. Faith was hacking celery to pieces at the counter, chopping as if the vegetables had *done* something to her. Dawn answered the door when no one else noticed.

"Oh. Hey, daddy." She smiled weakly, worried about yet another Buffy versus Hank argument, "Buffy's in the kitchen."

"Oh, that's fine." He told her a she shut the door behind them, I needed to talk to you."

"Um...OK...What's the matter?"

"Nothing, I was just...Are you happy, Dawn?"

Dawn raised her eyebrows at him and shrugged, "Well, yeah. I mean, everything is pretty good, right now. Buffy and Spike are getting married. Which, yeah, really weird, but I'm excited. And Faith's here, and she's pretty cool. And Angel and Cordelia and Wes are visiting till after the wedding!"

"Who?"

"Just some old friends." Buffy told him, standing in the doorway, "What brings you to our neck of the Hellmouth?"

"The what?"

"Nothing. Did you come to talk about Dawn again?"

"No, not this time." Hank sighed, "I wanted to apologize, for being so irrational. I've been an absentee father, and I'm sorry."

Buffy smiled, "I'm glad you aren't...yelling, this time."

"I want to propose a deal."

The Slayer's smile faltered, "What kind of deal?"

"Just that Dawn comes to visit me in the summers. If you want to come, you can too. But, I figured, with you getting married, you would be too busy."

"I'd be willing to make that deal." Dawn cut in, anxious to end the dispute, "A few weeks out of the year, no problem."

Buffy nodded slowly, "If Dawn agrees, so do I."

A look of relief passed over Hank's face, "Good. Also, since you're my daughter, and whether you believe it or not, I do love you, I want to help with the wedding."

"Oh!" Buffy laughed, "Oh, no, don't do that. It's really small. Just me, Spike, Dawn, and maybe ten friends. It's not even a church wedding. We're having it at night, here at the house with a small reception at the Bronze."

"What's a Bronze?"

"It's a club around here, very small. Actually, I don't even have bridesmaids..."

Hank tilted his head to the side, "How long have you been engaged?"

"About a month."

"So, this is a really, last-minute kind of thing? That seems a little...shady."

Buffy felt a wave of fear hit her. He knew. "Um...nope. Not shady at all. We just want to keep it simple."

"Uh huh...Well, either way, I'd like to be there to give my little girl away."

Buffy once again panicked. She stuttered as she tried to find the words to explain that Giles would give her away, "Well, Dad...there's this thing..."

**2003**

**Los Angeles**

Dawn paced nervously around her bedroom in her dad's LA apartment. She had *no* slue what was going on, only that she had been told to go back to her father's while everyone else from LA ran off to Sunnydale. And they hadn't bothered to tell her what had happened that was *so* urgent.

"I am seventeen, people." Dawn mumbled to herself, "I am ALLOWED to know what's happening with my own SISTER."

"Dawn?" the feminine voice from the other side of the door only served to annoy Dawn further. She and Buffy's future *step-mother*, Gretchen, was a primo-bitch who was always acting like the perfect mommy in front of their father, all sappy and irritating.

"What?" Dawn snapped, yanking open the door.

"Your father wanted to know if you felt like going out with us to Chez Ramon for dinner." She asked sweetly, and Dawn glimpsed her father in a tux, fastening his cufflinks behind Gretchen, "You can get all dressed up, you'd like that wouldn't you, Dawnie."

"Don't call me that." Dawn muttered, "And, no, thank you. I'll just order pizza."

Gretchen rolled her eyes, then turned to Dawn's father with a huge smile, the skirt of her fancy black dress so tight Dawn wondered *how* the woman moved in it.

"Suit yourself, Princess." Hank called as they left, and Dawn fought the urge to flip him the finger. 

"See ya, suckers." She muttered as soon as she heard them get into the elevator, her ear pressed to the penthouse door, then she hurried to her room, packing a bag to head home to Sunnydale.

**2003**

**Sunnydale**

Three slightly dusty people joined the crowd that had begun to gather where Drusilla and Buffy fought, watching with interest.

"Wow. Back to basics, huh?" Cordelia smirked, "It's a good old fashioned cat fight."

Faith nodded, "Think I should jump in and help?"

"Don't you DARE!" Spike called from his spot against the wall, still chained, "This is way too fun Let it last a while."

Fred rolled her eyes and skirted the fighting pair, picking up a ring of keys that had been dropped during the fight, and went unnoticed to unlock Spike's chains, "You don't have to be a physicist to know to unchain the prisoner." She muttered, trying one of the keys in the shackles binding his feet to the floor.

Meanwhile, Gunn fought off any stray minions while Tarah and Willow chanted furiously side by side. Buffy back flipped, almost slamming into the watching crowd, her hand massaging her scalp.

"You pulled my HAIR!" She said in disbelief, glaring at Drusilla, "Enough of this junior high crap. What's the matter Dru? Too afraid to *really* fight?"

Spike watched, completely still, and Fred had stopped fumbling with the keys. The look Drusilla was giving Buffy was murderous. He knew what it meant, and he knew damn well Buffy probably *didn't*.

"Buffy, luv..." He tried to get her to take her gaze off her opponent, his voice wavering slightly.

"Look into my eyes." Drusilla whispered hypnotically.

Across the room, Angel realized quite suddenly what was happening. He looked over at Faith, "This is where we jump in."


	22. The party is coming

**2002**

**Sunnydale**

"Well." Hank was sitting in the living room, looking slightly dumbstruck, "You asked someone else to give you away."

"Not *someone else* as if I just, forgot I had a father." Buffy insisted impatiently, "Someone else as if that person has been there for me. Something you have not been."

Hank sighed, "I know...but, who *is* this--guy--who's giving you away."

"Giles."

"Who's Giles?"

Buffy looked helplessly at her sister, "It's complicated. He was my high school librarian."

"A *librarian* is giving you away at your wedding?"

"Dad, just drop it. It doesn't matter who Giles is, all that matters is that he is giving me away. End of discussion."

There was a rather awkward silence before Hank spoke again, "At least let me give you a rehearsal dinner."

"Why? There isn't really a big ceremony. So why bother?"

"Just...let an old man do something for his daughter?"

Buffy gave him a pointed and sad look, "Yeah, but don't you think you could have done something else for your daughter? Like...Help her after her mother died? Or, maybe send money to help with bills? Dad, it's not that I'm not glad you've decided to help now. It's just that I'm still angry that you came here placing blame on me for things that weren't my fault."

Hank sighed, "I said I was sorry...Let me make it up to you with this dinner, then we'll worry about other things?"

"Fine...But I want it simple and casual, Dad. Nothing huge or extravagant. That's not my style, and I *know* it's not Spike's."

**2003**

**Sunnydale**

Buffy snapped out of the partial hypnosis when Angel shoved her out of the way, "Buffy, don't look at her."

"What?"

"She'll pull you in...just don't look at her." And with the group not blocking the door, Buffy could see that Gunn was swamped with minions. While Angel and Faith tried to distract Drusilla and Fred kept trying to unlock Spike, Buffy motioned for Wesley and Cordelia to follow her to help Gunn.

"It's about damn time!" The former street kid complained, throwing a punch at a game-faced minion's head, "I was starting to get tired."

"Quite sorry." Wesley said offhandedly, staking one of the fledgelings quickly, "Buffy was being hypnotized."

"I was?" Buffy shrieked, kicking at one minion while she staked another.

"Yeah," Cordelia managed, "Drusilla has this freaky thing where she can hypnotize pretty much anyone. You're all in her thrall or whatever, and the next thing ya know, you're dead...Best to let Angel deal."

"Right." Buffy grunted as she was blindsided by one of the vampires, "She'd never hurt her precious sire, right?"

Inside, Drusilla lashed out at Angel, catching him across the cheek with her nails.

"You're ruining my fun, Angelus." She pouted, stomping her foot like a petulant child, "You're so depressing these days."

Faith came at her from behind, stake poised, but the vampiress turned quickly, grabbing her arm and twisting.

Meanwhile, Fred had one shackle left to go on Spike's restraints.

"Hurry up..." He growled, struggling against it.

"I'm trying, I'm trying!" She insisted.

Spike rolled his eyes, "Sod this." He pulled, hard, twisting his wrist and making his hand as small as possible, and in a few long seconds, his hand was free, "OW! Damn, I think I broke a few bones..."

Fred winced, "Can you fight?"

"Oh hell yes..." He replied, launching himself into the fight.

**2002**

**Sunnydale**

****

By the next day, Buffy regretted ever deciding to marry *anyone* in the first place. In the past two hours since breakfast, her father had called twice with two rehearsal dinner suggestions, both of which she had said "absolutely not" to. One had been an afternoon 'tea' outdoors. The other had been at an over the top expensive restaurant. Then, only moments after hanging up with her father (after telling him there would be NO ice sculptures), she got a call from some flower company saying Hank Summers had booked them. After un-booking them, Buffy tried to ask Spike about his tux fitting the evening before. Her only answer had been, "It was awful, and if you bloody well send me to that place again, I'll kill the bloke with the tape measure, searing head pain be damned."

Then, Wesley and Cordelia showed up, and Faith bolted, saying she had to run to 'somewhere'. Wesley had been quiet ever since they had arrived from LA, and now Faith was acting Schizophrenic. After Wes and Cordelia had gone, Buffy was left with the impression that the former May Queen had *something up her sleeve.

By the end of the day, Buffy was informed that the next night would be her bachelorette party.

"Will? Where are you?"

"Umm…Tarah's." And Buffy could actually *hear* the blush in her friend's voice, "Actually, I'm calling to let you know.."

"Let me know what? Is something wrong?"

"No! No, no, nothing's *wrong*. But, um, there's this thing and fthdecdedtigveyouabchlrtprtytmorownght."

"What?" She shrieked into the phone, then heard a clatter as Willow dropped it.

"It wasn't my idea!" She insisted, "Faith and Cordelia ganged up on me! It was…scary. I said, No siree, Buffy wouldn't like that, but they're both really persistent people. Plus, maybe it'll be fun?"

Buffy sighed, rubbing a hand over her eyes, "Oh God…this day couldn't be worse."

"Well, actually…"

"Don't you DARE give me more bad news, Willow Rosenberg." 

The voice on the other end of the phone sighed, "Well…Xander thought it would be funny to make Spike have a bachelor party."

Buffy promptly hung up before she said anything she would regret later.


	23. I would

-----------  
2002  
Sunnydale  
-------------  
  
"I am going to kill you"  
  
Willow cowered back from the doorway, the glowering blond on the other side glaring at her, "I'm sorry! I told you. Faith and Cordelia are really scary together."  
  
"I heard that!" Cordelia told her, pushing the red head into the house as she and Anya followed, carrying bags and pillows, "And, thank you."  
  
Faith came downstairs, grinning, "Good, they're here."  
  
"Faith, what are you thinking?" Buffy demanded, noting the pillows, "And why does everyone have pillows?"  
  
"It's a sleepover bachelorette party." Dawn said, coming downstairs, her pillow and blanket in hand, "Shut up, and enjoy it."  
  
It was just past dark, and the bachelorette party (which the guest of honor was completely against) was being set up. Spike watched from the doorway.  
  
"What's going on?" He asked, staring at the seven women crowding the living room with wide eyes.  
  
"It's Buffy's bachelorette party." Tarah explained.  
  
"The boys will be around for you soon, blondie." Faith assured him.  
  
"The who?" He narrowed his eyes, "You don't mean..."  
  
There was a knock at the door and Dawn hurried to answer, finding a glowering Angel and a mischevous Xander waiting.  
  
"NO!" Spike growled, starting to move, but Faith grabbed him by the back of the shirt, pointing him towards Angel and Xander, "No! Bloody Hell, woman LET GO."  
  
"I'm sorry." Buffy whispered, kissing him on the cheek, "Have fun?"  
  
"Fun?!" He growled, being dragged out the door, "Look who I'm WITH, Buffy! Slayer! Help!"  
  
She smothered a giggled and Angel rolled his eyes, grabbing his hissing childe by the back of the neck to a car Buffy recognized as the black converible. Surprisingly, her Watcher sat int he back, Wesley in front.  
  
"Oh God." She laughed as they squeezed in, "Giles is going."  
  
Willow nodded, "Yeah. He, too, was dragged into the evil plot of Faith, Cordelia, and Xander."  
Faith snorted, "Please. Red had just as much to do with this as ANY of us."  
------------  
2003  
Sunndydale  
  
------------  
  
Buffy and the others had long ago finished off the minions, and the blond now watched with wide eyes as Spike and Drusilla faced off in the middle of the room. How the scenario had flipped was beyond her comprehension. Whereas she had been the one fighting Drusilla, now it was Spike and he was *pissed* and looked deadly. The group watched as the former lovers circled eachother.  
  
"You can't do it, William." Drusilla whispered, stopping her endless rotation around him, "Even if you wanted to, you would never kill your true love."  
  
"You're right." He growled, "I wouldn't. But that doesn't mean I won't kill *you*"  
  
"Please." She lifted her hands, "You cannot tell me that you, my Dark Prince, are in love with a Slayer. It's silly, Spike." Drusilla dropped her hands and moved colser to him. She pushed her hair back away from her chest, and pointed to her heart, "If yout hink you're brave enough to kill your love, your sire, then do it now."  
  
Spike hesitated and she cackled insanely, "I knew you wouldn't. The stars, they were singing tonight, they were. Oh, what a coward you are--"  
  
And then it was silent save for the slight WOOSH of a body becoming ash. And the stake clattered from Spike's hand onto the floor. 


	24. Did you or Did you not

--------  
2002  
Sunnydale  
--------  
  
By eleven that night, the bachelorette party was in full swing, with music blaring from the stereo and the girls sprawled over the living room, re-living high school (the semi-good parts) and for some, past lives. Anya had just finished regaling them with a tale of boiling puss and sores that she had inflicted on one of her victims.  
  
"Hey, where do you think they took Spike?" Buffy asked suddenly, "I mean, this is Angel and Giles...and Wesley."  
  
"Oh, God." Cordelia began to laugh, "Angel in a strip club...GILES in a strip club...Too funny. Can you imagine Giles, cleaning-" She dissolved into giggles, "Cl-cleaning his glasses while some blond with silicone boobs tries to-to...Oh god."  
  
Fred frowned, "A strip club."  
  
Faith rolled her eyes and placed a hand on the Texan's shoulder, "I don't know you too well, sweetie, but you've got Dark Chocolate wrapped around your little finger."  
  
While Fred blushed furiously, Anya began another story.  
  
"Anya!" Buffy clapped a hand gently over the former demon's mouth, "I beg you. No more puss or incineration."  
  
---  
  
Spike, on the other hand, was having one of the best nights *ever*. Not because there was a red-head with a chest the size of which no creature of God's green Earth had ever come by naturally was practically LICKING him. No, he wasn't even paying attention to her. It was the look on his sire's face. Pure discomfort and possibly disgust with himself for being there.  
"Hey, uh, sweetheart." Spike tugged the stripper's arm, "Why don't you go see my friend over there, put a smile on his face."  
  
The girl shrugged and strutted off to Angel, and Spike called out, "Don't make him TOO happy, now!"  
  
Oh, it was a GOOD night.  
  
---  
  
"OK, truth time." Buffy said, leaning against a stack of pillows, "I wanna know what's up with Faith and Wesley."  
  
Cordelia, Anya, Fred, Willow, Tarah, and Dawn all nodded, while the dark-haired Slayer took on a look rivaling the proverbial deer in the headlights.  
"What're you talking about?" She demanded, a little to quickly, a little too loudly."  
  
"WHy have you been avoiding eachother?" Willow asked, "Ever since last week, it's been insane. You two dart out of the room when the other is around. What's the what?"  
  
"I have no idea what you're getting to, Red."  
  
"Wesley and Faith did it!" Cordelia squeaked, "Ew!"  
  
Faith glared at her and the ex-cheerleader grinned sheepishly, "I mean...yay?"  
  
"You had sex with Wesley?!"  
  
Faith turned on Buffy, "Even if I did...it's none of your business." She glanced at Dawn, "Plus, Dawn's here."  
  
"HEY!" Dawn protested, "Excuse me but--"  
  
"Whatever." Buffy waved her hand, "she's almost sixteen. Just tell. Did you or did you not have sex with Wesley Wyndham-Price?"  
  
Faith took in a deep breath and as she let it ou, "Yes."  
  
A chorus of squeals replied as the other women pounced.  
  
"How was it?"  
  
"Is he...you know."  
  
"I still think, Ew. Does he kiss better now?"  
  
"When? Why? How? WHEN?"  
  
Faith groaned, "OK, new question, leave me alone."  
  
"Fine." Dawn grinned evilly, "I have a question for each of you since youa ll pretend I should be so innocent at my age. How old were you when you lost your--"  
  
"You don't need to know." Buffy cut her off, "Because it doesn't matter what *we* did. It matters what *you* do."  
  
Cordelia made a *pfft* sound and shrugged, "I don't care. I was seventeen."  
  
"Ummm....I don't remember." Anya said, "As a demon, who knows. As a human after the demon, Xander. I was technically 1120, but as a human I was...19."  
  
"Thirteen." Faith said, looking away at the surprised glances hse recieved.  
  
"I had just turned seventeen." Buffy grumbled, "But we all know how THAT worked, so...No sex for you, Dawn or your boyfriend turns into a maniac."  
  
"I was eighteen." Willow chimed in, "But um...that changed drastically with time."  
  
"I was seventeen." Tarah admitted.  
  
Fred blushed furiously when her turn came, and she mumbled out her reply.  
  
"What was that?" Cordelia nudged the physisist playfully, "Didn't hear ya."  
  
Fred glared at her friend, knowing that Cordelia was perfectly aware..."Well, considerin' I was stuck in a hell dimension for five years, I am still...yeah."  
  
Faith shook her head, "We have to have a talk with Gunn." 


	25. Now

Sunnydale   
2002  
~*~  
  
It was two days after the bachelorette party, the night before the wedding when Buffy invited Giles over to see the dress. Spike had been forced out of the house to go to the movies with Dawn and Willow, so the Slayer could finally have some quality time with her Watcher and so Spike wouldn't see the dress.  
  
"Are you ready?" She called from the landing at the top of the stairs, and Giles looked up from the magazine he had been reading.  
  
"Yes." He replied, setting the issue of whatever it was Dawn had had sitting on the coffee table, his full attention on the staircase.  
  
"Ok...ready or not." Buffy said, and descended the steps.   
  
Giles removed his glasses and stared at her in amazement. The dress was very simple, an ivory color with spaghetti straps and empire waist. The skirt was decorated with tiny seed pearls embroidered into the shapes of flowers. The way the fabric fell completely hid the fact that she was beginning to show.  
  
"You look...exquisite."  
  
The Slayer blushed and looked away, "Um...thanks. You don't think it's obvious that I'm you know, pregnant? I mean, not that it matters, it's not even a big wedding but you know Tara and Will are gonna be taking pictures and I don't want--"  
  
"You look stunning, and no, you can't tell. If anything, you look better for it."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"You glow, Buffy. You've grown up so much. I'm proud of you."  
  
She smiled and wiped at her eyes, "Giles! Don't make me all teary."  
  
"Sorry."  
  
"Look, Giles, I know it's been tense around here, what with my dad an all. And I just wanted to thank you for dealing with him. When you guys met he wasn't exactly polite or warm or anything."  
  
"He's got a right, I'll have to admit."  
  
Buffy groaned, "Please don't justify him, Giles. He *doesn't* have a right. And the way things are going, he's going to ruin this wedding. I mean, he really doesn't like Spike all that much."  
  
"Who does?"  
  
The Slayer tossed a throw pillow from the easy chair at him, "Hey! Watch it, that's my fiancee you're slamming...my fiancee. Eep."  
  
Giles smiled, "You should go change."  
  
"Yeah...Thanks again, Giles."  
  
"It's my honor." He replied, "If we all survive that dinner tomorrow."  
  
Buffy groaned on her way upstairs, "Maybe I still have time to elope."  
  
~*~  
~*~  
Sunnydale   
2003  
~*~  
~*~  
  
All Spike could feel as he fell to the floor were familiar arms wrapping around his shoulders and a soft voice whispering to him.   
  
"It's OK, Spike..." Buffy murmured, her lips just next to his ear. He was weak from lack of blood and drained from the fight...and hurting because he had just killed Drusilla.  
  
"We should get out of here." Angel was saying, "We can come back for the rest of her minions tomorrow night."  
  
Buffy helped Spike to his feet and supported him with an arm wrapped tightly around his waist as they joined the group filtering out the door.   
  
"You OK?" She asked, her grip on his tightening, "You had me worried for a while, there."  
  
"I'll be fine." He said without much inflection, "Let's just go home."  
  
Meanwhile, Cordelia was glancing back at Spike. She turned to Angel, "Is he OK? Shouldn't he be happy?"  
  
Angel sighed and shrugged a little, "It's tought to explain. Drusilla was partly Spike's sire And every childe carries a strong connection to their sire. Plus, Spike was madly in love with her for over a century. He just killed her. It's hard for him."  
  
"But you killed Darla that one time."   
  
"I had a soul. I was doing it for redemption and reasons Spike just doesn't realize he has right now."  
  
"But he has them?"  
  
"Yeah. Spike's been fighting for good for a long time, he just doesn't know it. He'll be fine, it'll just take a little while."  
  
~*~  
~*~  
Meanwhile, Dawn was sitting with Xander and Anya in the Summers' living kitchen. She had gotten there to find the couple babysitting Connor and Cassandra while the rest of the gang was out fighting Drusilla.  
  
"Why is Drusilla in town, anyway?" Dawn asked, stirring her hot cocoa, "I mean, what's the point? She knows Buffy will kick her undead ass."  
  
"We aren't really sure. She is insane, you know." Anya replied, "But I'm sure they'll be home any--"  
  
"We're home."  
  
"--minute."  
  
Dawn hopped up from her seat and hurried out to the living room to find everyone coming through the door at once, Buffy and Spike the last to enter. She took one look at Spike's face and knew something was wrong.  
  
"What happened?" She asked immediately, looking from person to person, "Is everyone alive and, you know, in one peice? WHY DIDN'T YOU CALL ME?"  
  
Buffy stared at her sister, "Dawn, what are you doing here? Does Dad know?"  
  
"No?"  
  
"We'll talk later."  
  
"Yeah, so what's going on?"  
  
"I'll explain," Angel said, motioning for Dawn to follow him to the kitchen, looking at Buffy as if to tell her to take care of Spike. She smiled her thanks and led the blonde vampire upstairs.  
  
"Let's go get cleaned up and I'll get you some blood, k?"  
  
"Uh huh..."  
  
Buffy tried to steer him to the bathroom, but he headed towards the nursery instead, "Spike? She's probably asleep..."  
  
He ignored her, easing the door open as softly as possible. Buffy followed silently and watched from the doorway as he went to the crib where Cassandra lay sound asleep. Spike's face went from blank to something she couldn't identify, but tears began to slowly make tracks down his cheeks as he leaned down to kiss his daughter's forehead. 


	26. We Wait

**2002 **

"I'd like to make a toast..."

Buffy gripped Spike's hand under the table with an iron hold, her nails digging into his palm as her father stood, glass raised. "I need to get out of here." She muttered, jaw clenched tight while her nails drew blood in her fiancee's palm.

"Another hour, and we can run like hell. Willow said." Spike said, trying to pull his hand away.

"To my daughter," Hank said, "who has grown to become a beautiful and strong young woman. And my future son in law...I don't know you that well...uh...but here's to you."

Spike swallowed the laugh that threatened to burst from his mouth, and squeezed Buffy's hand back. She smirked at him and took a sip of her water. "He's good with words." She said with a slight eye roll. She caught Giles' eyes at the other end of the long table and winked.

Meanwhile, Faith was fidgeting. Somehow, she had ended up between Dawn and Cordelia, and across from Wesley. While Dawn kept her occupied with her constant chatter, Wesley kept trying to shoot her meaningful looks. Her napkin was in shreds on her lap and she was sure her teeth would be ground to a powder by the end of the dinner. Luckily, Cordelia kept the former Watcher busy with her own constant chatter, so the looks were few and far between. Still, Faith felt like a caged animal.

"Faith? Are you listening?"

"Huh? What?" She looked over at Dawn, "You say something?"

"Can you pass the butter?"

"Oh...um...sure." Faith reached across the table, her fingers brushing Welsey's as he reached for the butter. She jerked her hand back, "You take it."

He looked at her for a moment then picked up the butter, handing it to Dawn when he was finished. He said something under his breath, but Faith couldn't make it out.

**2003**

Dawn let out a long breath as Angel finished recounting hte past day for her. "Wow...Poor Spike. Is he gonna be OK?"

"I'm sure he will be. Now, what posessed you to come down here on your own, without your father knowing?"

Dawn giggled, "The step-bitch was driving me crazy and I had a feeling something interesting was going on here. So I left. He probably won't even notice I'm gone."

"Dawn, you know that's not true."

"Oh please. Ever since he and Gretch the Wretch got engaged, he's not interested in me. Not that I care, I got pretty used to it."

"Gretch the Wretch?"

"My name for Gretchen. Like it?"

Angel laughed and put an arm over her shoulders, leading her back to the living room, "You're evil."

"I know."

Willow and Tarah leaned on eachother on one couch, exhausted from the magicks they had used, while the rest of the rag tag group of fighters were sprawled out on the living room floor or over the sofas.

"You all look beat." Xander commented, "Glad I wasn't there. But, I'm unclear on some stuff. Drusilla's dust?"

"Yup." Fred said through a yawn, laying her head on Gunn's shoulder. The ex street fighter nodded his agreement.

"Drusilla did that hypnotizing thing on blondie, then Spike got loose and went medieval on her ass."

"Sounds fun." Dawn said, sliding to the floor beside Cordelia, "Hey, where did Wes and Faith go?"

"Food run." someone replied, only moments before the couple came loudly through the front door, loaded down with junk food and drinks.

"So, what's the plan?" Faith asked, doling out bags of chips and boxes of Tasty Cakes.

"We wait."

"For what?"

"I don't know."

"OK, cool."


	27. Just A Word of Advice

_**2002 **_

Faith lifted the lighter to the cigarette between her lips and took a deep inhale, blowing the smoke into the air. She was leaning against the wall outside the hall where Hank had decided to throw the rehearsal dinner. After ten more minutes of staring into her chicken for fear of making eye contact with Wesley, Faith had fled saying she needed to go to the ladies' room. Now she stood watching cars go by, getting her nicotine fix and feeling like slime. What she was doing--avoiding Wesley at all costs--was cowardly and sleazy. She was treating him like a one night stand, like she had treated Xander. Worse even, because she already owed Wesley so much.

"Those things'll kill you." An accented voice said behind her and Faith turned, a smirk on her lips.

"Hey. Shouldn't you be in there with your blushing bride?"

Spike shrugged, "Are you kidding me?" He lit up his own cigarette, "It's getting to be suffocating in there."

"You don't breath."

"Funny, Number Two. Very funny." He said, taking a drag off his cigarette and leaning back on the wall, one leg bent. "So. I know why I'm out here. Why are you?"

"Suffocation." She replied, tossing down the butt and stomping it out, "I would just hi the road, but I promised Willow I'd stay."

"You too? I only have fifteen minutes or so left till the witch lets us go." Spike sighed, "Till then, why don't you tell me what's suffocating you besides Cordelia's perfume?"

Faith smirked, but looked away, "Wesley."

"The other Watcher?"

"Yeah. I'm avoiding him."

"Because...?"

"Long, long story." She said, "I screwed up. Let's leave it at that."

"Fine with me." Spike looked at her for a moment, one eyebrow raised, "I like you, Number Two, we're a lot alike."

"Stop calling me that. How are we alike?"

"We're both killers, for one." Faith winced, but Spike continued, "And whether it's prison or a chip, both of us had to change fast. And now, here we are. Both like a bunch of white hats. Sad, but good I guess."

The Slayer looked at him, "You're going through with this wedding, right?"

"Yeah, looks like it."

"Because, Spike?" 

"What?"

Faith stepped closer to him and grabbed his chin so he was forced to look at her, "Despite the history and the bullshit, despite the fact that I will always be "number two" next to Buffy, I love her like a sister because she's taken me in these past few weeks. Plus there's that whole slayer bond thing. So if you screw this up. If you hurt her, or her kid, you can be damn sure you'll meet my fist, then my stake. Got me?"

"Uh huh." He squeaked, then cleared his throat, returning to his normal voice, "I mean...yeah. I got you."

**_2003_**

Spike winced as Buffy cleaned the small cut on his forehead, "Bloody Hell." He murmured, and she blew softly on the wound to ease the sting.

"Big baby." She said absently, applying an antiseptic then bandaging the cut, "So...you're cleaner, you're patched up. Are we ready to talk?"

"No." He replied, taking one of her hands, "Can we just go to bed?"

"If you want. But I want to talk, Spike."

"We can. In the morning." He pleaded with his eyes and Buffy smiled, kissing him softly before backing away.

"Let me go tell everyone goodnight, I'll be right back up." She said.

Spike nodded and waited until she was gone to leave the bathroom and head back into the nursery to watch his daughter sleep.


	28. Someday

_**2002 **_

"I can't find Buffy"

"I can't find Spike."

"What?"

"What?"

"What do you mean you can't find her?"

"What do you mean you can't find him!"

Dawn gaped at Willow, "This is bad."

"Uh huh." The witch nodded in agreement, "It looks like...well they both kind of split?"

"Who split? There's no splitting!"

Willow looked at Anya and sighed, "Well this time there is."

"What do we do?" Dawn asked, wringing her hands in front of her.

"I guess we wait for them. Or send a search party." Willow replied. "I just don't want to deal with Mr. Summers."

**~*~**

Buffy handed the frozen yogurt over to the next swing and smiled, "This is nice."

Spike nodded, taking a scoop of chocolate forzen yogurt and licking it off the spoon, "Swingset, night breeze, good company."

"And really good frozen yogurt. Hand it over buster."

"And why should I?" He teased, holding the styrofoam cup away from her.

"Because I'm pregnant *and* the slayer and I want my chocolate and that combination equals dust for you."

Spike grinned and handed it over, "You're father'll dust me first when he realizes we're gone."

"Oh well. I figure, we'll just wait them out."

"Funny how we both run out on our wedding at the same time."

"Yup." Buffy swung gently as she ate, "Spike, I really do love you."

Spike looked over at her and smiled slightly, "That's good."

"That's good? That's all you have to say?"

"Yeah, that's about it. I love you too slayer but I realized how deathly afraid I am of two things."

"What are they?"

"Messing this up. And your father."

"Messing what up?"

Spike sighed, "If I marry you Buffy I'll bollocks it up. No doubt about it. It's the way I am. As soon as I get something I want I just ruin it--"

"Spike..."

"No, it's true. And that's why I was running." He cocked an eyebrow at her, "Your turn."

"Well...I don't know why I was leaving. I think the pressure was getting to be way too much. My father was just way too overbearing about this wedding thing...I just panickd." Buffy shrugged, taking another bite of frozen yogurt, "Doesn't mean I won't go through with the whole wedding thing someday."

Spike reached over and grabbed her hand and they sat in silence.

**~*~**

"I hear the bride and groom are missing in action."

Faith turned at the voice behind her. She had been standing on the back porch of the Summers' home, trying to avoid the very person who was standing before her, "Yeah. Dawn says they both flew the coop."

"Hm." Wesley walked up to stand beside her at the railing, "So."

"So."

There was a very long, very uncomfortable silence before Wesley said, "Faith, why are we playing this game?"

"I don't know what--"

"This cat and mouse. If you want to forget what happened, say so and be done with it."

Faith was silent as she looked down at her hands, which were clutching the railing with all her strength. She absently wondered if the wood would break.

"Well?" Do you?"

"Do I what?"

"Want to forget what happened?"

Faith finally looked up at him, "No." She let go of the railing and grabbed one of his hands, "It was a little unforgettable."

Wesley smiled, "Then what do you want."

"Um...I want a million bucks, a sweet car, an X-box, a--"

"Faith?"

"Yes, Wesley?" She grinned at him just before he kissed her soundly on the lips.

**_2003_**

Buffy woke up to find Spike curled around her, his eyes open and staring at her.

"Hi." She said, blinking away the blurriness of sleep.

"Hi." He replied.

"What's with the staring?"

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Will you marry me?"

Buffy smiled and rolled her eyes, "Sure."

"I'm serious."

"Are you?" She asked, this time with no smile, "Really?"

"Uh, yeah." He said, rolling his own eyes at her. "You told me once you would do the whole marriage thing. Someday. Can it be someday?"

"OK. Yes." Buffy giggled, "We are so twisted."

"Were we *ever* normal, Slayer?"

"No, and I like it that way."

_**The next chapter WILL BE the last one. Thank you all so very very very much for reading this and encouraging me. I love you all :)**_


	29. Endings

Italics are representing flashbacks here. :) This is the last chapter. I will post an author's note sometime tonight or tomorrow.

**May 15, 2004...The Wedding Day**

At he table in the Summers' dining room, a group of friends are gathered...

_Spike nodded, crossing the room as he finished wrapping his hand in a bandage. He stopped just in front of her and quirked a small smile, "Going back to the real world, pet?" _

_"Yeah. The one I actually live in?" She shouldered the bag and turned to leave, but Spike grabbed her shoulder, turning her to him. Buffy looked up at him, her eyes questioning and slightly annoyed. Spike dipped his head and pressed his lips to hers, gently moving them against her, kissing her softly._

"Giles! Speech!"

Giles looked up from his conversation with Wesley and sent a glare at Xander, but stood anyway. "Uh...Right." He raised his glass, "To Buffy and Spike. It has been a long an complicated road...."

_"You're still all vampy." She told him. Spike raised an eyebrow and raised a hand to feel the ridges. He hadn't noticed, which was strange. He hadn't been unconscious of his vampire mask since he had first been turned. He was about to change back into his human form when he Buffy raised her hand and touched the ridges over his eyes. _

_"What are you doing?" He asked softly, and Buffy dropped her hand quickly, as if catching herself. _

_"Just...nothing." _

"...but you have both perservered, and I am very proud. Though you aren't the most conventional couple," the people assembled at the table laughed, "And although things have been backwards, here and there,"

_"Spike, there's something I've got to tell you, and you're going to be...I don't know what you're going to be." _

_Spike sat down on the tattered couch in the center of the crypt, "Start talking." He said simply, hands resting on his knees. _

_"Spike...I'm pregnant."_

"You have come out better for it." He smiled and sat down, while everyone murmured and drank.

"That was nice. Thank you, Giles." Buffy said, sitting across from him beside Spike. She wore a simple white spaghetti strap dress, her hair pulled back in a clip. On her other side, Cassandra sat in a booster seat, her sandy brown curls braided with curls.

Dawn stood a few seats down, "Um...I guess since I'm the maid of honor and all, I should give my speech." She gave them all a nervous smile then said, "You guys used to be the greatest enemies."

_Buffy stood before him, a tiny, strong, bundle of dangerous energy "Do we really need weapons for this?"_

_Spike smiled "I just like them. They make me feel all manly." _

"And then you became this strange, somewhat twisted *thing*, that couldn't be defined. Actually, when the two of you got together, it was frightening." Dawn winked and Buffy rolled her eyes, "But seriously, it all eventually formed this great romance...well, after the two of you came to your senses."

_"How dare you, you evil bastard." She sobbed, "Don't treat me like...some whore who sleeps with everything with a dick between its legs. So you know, Spike, I'm carrying your demon spawn. I don't know how, or why. But I AM. And I don't want you anywhere near it. UNDERSTAND?"_

"And then there were the tears..."

_He laid his head in her lap, sobbing and apologizing over and over. Buffy stared at the top of his head, then brought her hands up, stroking his tousled hair. Her own tears fell silently as she gently lifted his head up. He leaned up and kissed her gently, sweetly. They had never, ever kissed like that before in all the breath-taking moments they'd had. They had never shared a kiss so soft, almost chaste._

"And then all the public affection. In the end, no matter what, you guys are still together. I just want to say that I feel really lucky to have a brother-in-law that treats my sister so well, and a sister who can kick my brother-in-law's ass when he steps out of line."

Dawn sat back down as everyone chuckled. Spike looked indignant, "I should bite her for that one." He muttered, taking a long gulp of his spiked blood.

"You can only bite one person and that is me." Buffy whispered.

"Yeah, but you like it too much." He replied with a grin. "Love you, Slayer."

_"I fought my feelings harder than I've fought ANTHING. But when you love someone, it doesn't just go away. You should know that as well as anyone." _

_"I love you, Slayer. You're a strange bird. But I love you."_

"I love you too." She said, "I must, I married you."

"Yeah, what's with that?" He joked.

_Spike leaned over to Buffy, I'm going to ask you something, and it would help if you said yes._

_That depends on what you're asking. _

_I want to marry you._

**And they lived happily ever after...**

  
**Meanwhile, outside...**

"Faith?"

The brunette Slayer turned at the voice of her fiancee and smiled, "Hey."

"What are you doing out here?"

"Getting air." She replied as Wesley's arms wrapped around her from behind, "Thinking. Remembering some stuff."

"Like what?"

"Like the night you asked me if I wanted to forget what happened between us."

"You said no."

"Yeah I did...I'm glad I did."

"So am I."

"It's hard to believe B's married. And to Spike! And Cassandra...You know she and Connor are 3 now?"

"They grew up."

"Yeah...Hey, Wes?"

"Yes?"

"What do you think of kids?"

"Why?"

"Just asking..."

"I want them. Very much so."

"Good." Faith smiled and turned in his arms, "So...if...you know, about 9 months from now we just so happened to have a baby, you'd be ok?"

"Faith are you..."

"Uh huh."

Wesley blinked, "Uh..."

"K, well, I'm gonna go back inside, honey." Faith leaned up and kissed him lightly on the lips and smiled cheerfully, "Join me when you're ready."

**And underground, in a small cave...**

"Interesting, isn't it?"

"Very interesting, madame."

"A vampire and a slayer. Very, very poetic. Hmm..."

"What is madame thinking?"

"I'm thinking...perhaps we should visit Sunnydale, no?"

"What are your plans, madame?"

"The children."

"Children?"

"The Unnatural Ones...they are going to mean something to me someday...Then we will go to Sunnydale."

"Yes, madame...when you say it is time..."

  
**THE END....or is it?**

  
  



End file.
